Life style
Being single in your thirties shouldn’t make you feel guilty
It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single woman in possession of ‘good’ moral character must be in search of a husband. That is, it was a truth rather universally echoed by a society hell-bent on maintaining the dubiously constructed integrity of its hetero-patriarchial power structure. Although the parameters of what is acceptable and what is embraced on a societal level have begun to show a little malleability, there is still an inherent rigidness when it comes to the idea of the single woman. A single woman is not merely thought to be undesired or unlovable but is also broadly and openly labelled a failure for not having been able to secure the all-important husband.
If I had a penny for every time I was subjected to an interrogation that aimed to investigate the root cause of my singleness, I would be a rich woman on a sun-drenched seashore and not a writer chasing invoices. And it is this wanton curiosity—from family, friends, loved ones and more than the occasional impertinent stranger—that offends me the most. Within South Asian circles especially, it is considered routine, if not entirely loving, to lambast a single woman for not having found a husband, and while it can sometimes adopt the desperately teasing lilt of a joke destined to fail, familial pressure only adds another voice to the already haunting chorus questioning your right to exist while single in your thirties. It gives rise to a fight-or-flight reflex within me wherein I invariably choose the ‘fight’ option and am cornered into making a defensive rebuke of the question-asker, while also trumpeting my single and content status—like a deer in the headlights, if that deer were slightly rabid.
I could tell you that I love living alone and being responsible for nobody but myself, I could wax rhapsodically about the unbearably tender intimacy of nurturing yourself or the astounding clarity that can sometimes come with solitude. But the truth is that being single in your thirties isn’t all self-care Sundays and group hugs with your best girlfriends and bell hooks quotes come to life. It can be frustrating, lonely and embarrassingly full of yearning. But single women of a certain age are rarely, if ever, given the space to feel the full spectrum of emotions that being unattached can inspire. There is a pop-culture push, à la Sex and the City, to trumpet your singleness as a badge of pride. Anything resembling unhappiness in single women over thirty is perceived as an admittance of guilt; a silent concurrence with the school of thought that labels you an ‘overeducated and undersexed’ member of the brigade of career-focussed women who have sacrificed lifelong companionship at the altar of personal ambition.
What lies beneath the probing questions from ostensibly well-meaning aunties and terrifying offers from friends to set you up with a degenerate cousin is that society, broadly—and Indian families, specifically—have no idea what to do with or how to react to single women. The life trajectory of a woman is so intrinsically tied to the idea of marriage within the South Asian context that a woman living her life without a man baffles the public imagination. There is a burden of expectation that comes with being a good daughter from a good family, and that expectation consists almost entirely of finding a similarly well-positioned husband and creating good little children to perpetuate this cycle of alleged goodness. There is a prevailing air of disappointment and disapproval that surrounds single Indian women in their thirties, and it is sometimes thick and putrid enough to pierce even the happiest single-by-choice bubbles of existence.
This is not to say anything of the plight faced by people who fall outside the gender binary or heterosexuality. For those who are not waiting for a “mister” at all, the task of trying to live life without bowing to the pressures of mainstream society adopts a Sisyphean quality. There is a plurality of gender and sexual identities that help weave the fabric of society, and suppressing these identities in favour of strict hetero-patriarchy not only fails those that need to be the most supported, BBCbut also quashes any hope of social progress in favour of keeping up with the Joneses.
Even for those that do fall into the narrow confines of what is socially acceptable, the path for single adult women is fraught, hostile and littered with indignities. From apartment buildings in Mumbai refusing to rent to single women (citing their alleged immorality as the cause) to the dismal statistic that working women who state their preference to continue their careers post-marriage receive 22% fewer matches on matchmaking websites or the fact that arranged marriage—which constitutes 97% of the marriages in India—creates an imbalanced power structure that favours men and allows for both the extortion of money from women’s families via dowry and the perpetuation of caste politics.
If I am told one more time to “put myself out there”, I will stage a violent revolt. Every single woman in her thirties has a Rolodex of unsolicited advice that she has received in response to her singledom. For a time following the release of Lori Gottlieb’s 2008 self-help tome, Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough, grown women could be convinced that attraction could be sacrificed in lieu of someone who “would make a good father and husband,” if that woman were “running out of time.” Although we have seemingly graduated from that enlightened school of thought, it doesn’t stop people from telling you to go on more dates or married friends asking if you have “tried Bumble” or your parents emotionally blackmailing you by referring to hypothetical grandchildren. It does not stop people from having the audacity to label you “too picky” or “too introverted” or “too opinionated” or the kind of person that just hasn’t put enough effort into The Cause.
The truth is, I would love to be set up with the right person or to have them magically glide into my life determined to present me with a happily-ever-after. I would love for a serendipitous run-in to turn into the relationship of a lifetime. I would love to swipe right and find Mr. Better-Than-You-Ever-Thought-It-Could-Be. But I am not willing to settle or saddle myself with a person who does not add love or intimacy or emotional value to my life. And I would like to spend the time between now and the moment I meet the inevitable One in peace and not languishing in shame, as prescribed by society.– BBC
Life style
Whispers of love beneath distant skies
A destination wedding in Sri Lanka is not just an event,it is an experience that unfolds over days, sometimes even a week. From the golden shores of Bentota to the colonial charm of Galle Fort, and the cool romantic highlands of Nuwara Eliya, Sri Lanka offers a stunning diversity of settings for exotic weddings. Destination weddings are more than romantic celebrations, they are a dynamic driver of tourism, drawing high spending travellers, global attention, and long stay visitors. In Sri Lanka, these weddings seamlessly blend scenic beauty, culture and luxury promoting Sri Lanka on the world stage.
Sri Lanka is one of the most diverse destination wedding hubs in Asia – drawing couples from India, Europe and even Pakistan who are looking for something beyond the ordinary.
What makes Sri Lanka irrestible is its rare ability to offer multiple wedding backdrops within a few hours – from sun kissed beaches, misty mountains, colonial charm, and lush tropical landscapes, all seamlessly woven into one unforgettable celebration.
For many couples the dream begins by the sea. Along the southern and western coastlines, Sri Lanka offers a perfect beach wedding, with golden sunsets, and endless horizons.
For many Indian couples, in particular, Sri Lanka presents the perfect blend of proximity and exotic appeal. While the couples seeking cooler climes and a dramatic scenery, Sri Lanka’s hill country offers a dreamlike alternative. Nuwara Eliya, often called Little England, is loved by European couples. With its colonial bungalows, rose gardens and cool climate, it lends itself perfectly to elegant garden weddings, reminiscent of an English country affair.
What sets Sri Lanka apart is not just the beauty of these locations but how seamlessly everything comes together – food, culture and locations.
From décor and catering to cultural performances and legal formalities – ensure couples and their families to focus solely on the celebration itself without hassles.
- An ancient symbol of grace at a modern wedding
It is also the versatility that attracts a global clientale, Indian weddings find space for grandeur and tradition while European couples discover intimacy and charm. Some European couples are drawn to Sri Lanka’s tropical allure, heritage architecture, and a promise of a wedding that feels both intimate and extraordinary. Hotels and resorts across the island have elevated destination weddings into an art form.
Some of the hotels, such as Shangri-La Hambantota, Cinnamon Bentota Beach, Sheraton Kosgoda and Weligama offer bespoke wedding packages that go for beyond décor and dining.
Wedding planners curate menus, from floral themes, cultural performance to dining, ensuring each celebration reflects the couples story. Guests, too, are not left out, they find themselves embarking on wildlife safaris or indulge in Ayurvedic wellness retreats along the southern coast. Weddings becomes rich with memory making moments. Unlike Bali or Phuket, Sri Lanka offers five star venues, world class cuisine to the island’s ability to offer something deeply personal yet effortlessly luxurious.
In Sri Lanka, couples will never confined to a single venue. A beach ceremony can be followed by a hill country honeymoon or a cultural
celebration near Sigiriya can transition into a coastal after party and personalised service at a fraction of the cost, allowing couples to enjoy their ceremonies at a low cost. Culturally the island offers depths and colour. Kandyan dancers, traditional drummers, Poruwa ceremonies and vibrant local rituals add authencity and character.
The island’s year round tropical climate further enhances its appeal. Couples can host outdoor ceremonies under open skies. The exotic landscapes lend themselves beautifully to photography. Above all this, Sri Lanka offers warmth and the hospitality is genuine and deeply personal.
Sri Lanka stands out in a world where destination weddings are becoming increasingly extravagant.
Sri Lanka is a place where love is celebrated against a backdrop of nature, culture and timeless beauty. And perhaps that is why so many couples choose Sri Lanka to say ‘I do’ and to began their journey in a place that feels like home.
By Zanita Careem
Life style
Festive cheer comes alive
at Cinnamon Grand
This Avurudu season, Cinnamon Grand Colombo invited guests to embrace the warmth, joy, and timeless traditions of the Sinhala and Tamil New Year with a thoughtfully curated series of festive experiences for the whole family.
Blending authentic Sri Lankan heritage with the hotel’s signature hospitality, the celebrations promise a memorable April filled with traditional flavours, lively entertainment, and meaningful moments of togetherness.
The festivities began with the Avurudu themed tea buffet, at the tea lounge, where guests savoured a delightful spread of seasonal sweets, festive treats, and local favourites inspired by Avurudu traditions.
During the season, Nuga Gama came alive with Happy Avurudu, featuring a charming traditional sweet table followed by an authentic Sri Lankan lunch buffet. Guests immersed themselves in the festive spirit with traditional Avurudu games, cultural celebrations, and special seasonal activities, recreating the joy of a classic Sri Lankan New Year gathering.
- Behind every celebration is a team of culinary artists
As the celebrations continued into the evening, Nuga Gama presented the Sri Lankan New Year Dinner on 14th April, an indulgent dinner buffet showcasing cherished festive recipes and beloved Sri Lankan flavours.
The guests enjoyed a host of seasonal experiences across the hotel. Coffee Stop featured the Avurudu Kavili Pop up, offering an irresistible selection of traditional New Year sweets, while palms of beautifully curated festive hampers perfect for gifting family, friends, and colleagues.
Adding to the vibrant atmosphere, the Avurudu feast at the lobby brought the traditions of the season to life with live raban performances by traditional Sri Lankan ladies and live cooking stations serving freshly prepared local sweet treats, creating an immersive festive experience for guests and visitors alike.
For those looking to extend the celebrations, Cinnamon Grand Colombo also introduced a festive Avurudu stay, inviting guests to enjoy the season with an exclusive city escape. Guests booking with the promo code CGA26 enjoyed special benefits, including 15% off on all food and beverage, 10% off spa treatments, and a complimentary stay for one child, valid for stays until 30th April 2026. Reservations can be made via cinnamonhotels.com.
The celebrations continue later in the month with Baila Night at Nuga Gama on 24th April, featuring a lively performance by Sri Band SL, followed by a delicious dinner buffet in a festive village style setting.
Celebrate Avurudu season with unforgettable flavours, cherished traditions, and heartfelt hospitality at Cinnamon Grand Colombo, where every experience is designed to capture the true spirit of the season.
Life style
After dark in Sri Lanka: Tiny wild cats step into the spotlight
Sri Lanka’s wildlife story has long been told through its giants — the stealth of the Sri Lankan leopard, the quiet power of the Asian elephant, and the ocean drama of the blue whale.
These icons have shaped the island’s global image, drawing travellers from across the world.
But as the sun slips below the horizon and the last safari jeeps return to camp, another Sri Lanka awakens — one that is far less known, yet just as extraordinary.
In the half-light of wetlands, along bunds of ancient irrigation tanks, and at the edges of village paddy fields, three elusive felines begin their nightly rounds. The Fishing Cat, the Jungle Cat, and the Rusty-spotted Cat — small, secretive, and largely overlooked — are now emerging as the island’s most intriguing untold wildlife story.
And according to researchers, their time in the spotlight may have finally come.
A Hidden World, Ready to Be Seen
“These cats have always been here — living quietly alongside us,” says Chaminda Jayasekara, a researcher and conservationist who has spent years studying Sri Lanka’s lesser-known carnivores.
“What is changing now is not the cats, but our awareness. We are beginning to understand that these species are not rare in the sense of being absent — they are rare because we have not been looking for them in the right way,” he said.
Jayasekara notes that all three species are distributed across wide swathes of the island — from the dry zone landscapes of the Cultural Triangle to the wetter lowlands and even human-dominated environments.
“The remarkable thing about the Fishing Cat and the Jungle Cat in particular is their adaptability. They are not confined to deep water. They use wetlands, paddy fields, scrublands — habitats that exist right next to where people live,” he explained.
- Jungle cat
- Rusty-spotted cat
- Chaminda with wife Thilini Sandamali
Three Cats, Three Remarkable Stories
The largest of the trio, the Fishing Cat, is a wetland specialist — a muscular, spotted predator with partially webbed paws built for hunting in water. Across Sri Lanka’s vast network of tanks, marshes, and mangroves, it stalks fish with silent precision.
Globally listed as Vulnerable and considered endangered nationally, the species faces mounting pressure from wetland loss and pollution. Yet paradoxically, it is often found within sight of human settlements.
“Seeing a Fishing Cat hunting along a village tank is one of the most powerful wildlife experiences Sri Lanka can offer,” Jayasekara said. “It challenges everything people think they know about where wildlife belongs.”
The Jungle Cat, by contrast, is a creature of grass and scrub — long-legged, alert, and often active at dusk. It thrives in the margins where farmland meets wilderness, preying on rodents, birds, and reptiles.
Though not currently endangered, its habitat is steadily shrinking.
“These are landscapes we often dismiss as ‘empty’ or ‘degraded,’” Jayasekara noted. “But for the Jungle Cat, they are essential. Losing them means losing an entire ecological story.”
And then there is the smallest of them all — the
Rusty-spotted Cat.
Weighing little more than a kilogram, this tiny feline — found only in Sri Lanka, India, and Nepal — holds the distinction of being the world’s smallest wild cat. With its soft, rust-coloured coat and disproportionately large eyes adapted for night vision, it appears almost unreal in the wild.
“To encounter a Rusty-spotted Cat is something very few people in the world have experienced,” Jayasekara said. “It is not just a sighting — it is a moment of disbelief.”
A Tourism Opportunity After Dark
What makes these cats especially compelling is not just their rarity, but their accessibility.
Unlike the island’s larger, more famous wildlife, sightings do not always require long hours inside national parks. Instead, they can occur in carefully managed landscapes — wetlands, forest edges, and even within the grounds of eco-sensitive hotels.
One such example is Jetwing Vil Uyana, a property that has quietly demonstrated what is possible.
Located in the heart of the Cultural Triangle, the hotel sits within a restored wetland ecosystem where all three cat species have been recorded. Over more than a decade, guided night walks conducted by trained naturalists have offered guests rare glimpses into this hidden world.
“These experiences must be done with extreme care,” Jayasekara emphasised. “Low-impact lighting, small groups, and knowledgeable guides are critical. If done incorrectly, we risk disturbing the very species we are trying to protect.”
A Changing Global Audience
Sri Lanka’s tourism narrative has long revolved around its “big five” — elephants, leopards, sloth bears, blue whales and sperm whales. But global travel trends are shifting.
Today’s wildlife traveller is increasingly seeking intimate, lesser-known experiences — encounters that feel personal, rare, and authentic.
“For a visitor from Europe, where wild cats are virtually absent, the idea of seeing even one species is exciting,” Jayasekara said. “To potentially see three — in one country, in one journey — is extraordinary.”
He believes Sri Lanka is uniquely positioned to capitalise on this niche.
“This is not about replacing what we already have. It is about expanding the story — showing that Sri Lanka is not just about large animals, but also about the small, the secretive, and the scientifically fascinating.”
Conservation Through Experience
Beyond tourism, the implications are deeper.
The Fishing Cat continues to decline due to habitat destruction and human conflict. The Rusty-spotted Cat remains poorly studied, with significant gaps in scientific knowledge. Even the adaptable Jungle Cat is losing ground as grasslands disappear.
Jayasekara argues that responsible tourism can play a vital role in reversing these trends.
“When communities begin to see value in these animals — not as threats, but as assets — attitudes change,” he said. “A Fishing Cat alive in a wetland can generate far more long-term benefit than a wetland converted for short-term gain.”
Tourists, too, become part of the conservation chain.
“A single meaningful encounter can transform how a person sees the natural world. They go back, they share the story, and suddenly these small cats are no longer invisible.”
The Night Belongs to Sri Lanka
Across the island, as darkness settles over ancient reservoirs and forest edges, this quiet transformation is already underway.
A ripple disturbs the surface of a tank — a Fishing Cat at work. In the tall grass, a Jungle Cat pauses, ears alert. And somewhere in the shadows, almost impossibly small, a Rusty-spotted Cat watches with luminous eyes.
These are not distant, unreachable moments. They are unfolding now — in landscapes that millions pass every day.
Sri Lanka has long been celebrated for what it shows the world in daylight. But, as researchers and conservationists now suggest, its future may also lie in what it chooses to reveal after dark.
“The story is already here,” Jayasekara said. “We just need to tell it — carefully, responsibly, and with the respect these animals deserve.”
By Ifham Nizam
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