Life style
Being single in your thirties shouldn’t make you feel guilty
It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single woman in possession of ‘good’ moral character must be in search of a husband. That is, it was a truth rather universally echoed by a society hell-bent on maintaining the dubiously constructed integrity of its hetero-patriarchial power structure. Although the parameters of what is acceptable and what is embraced on a societal level have begun to show a little malleability, there is still an inherent rigidness when it comes to the idea of the single woman. A single woman is not merely thought to be undesired or unlovable but is also broadly and openly labelled a failure for not having been able to secure the all-important husband.
If I had a penny for every time I was subjected to an interrogation that aimed to investigate the root cause of my singleness, I would be a rich woman on a sun-drenched seashore and not a writer chasing invoices. And it is this wanton curiosity—from family, friends, loved ones and more than the occasional impertinent stranger—that offends me the most. Within South Asian circles especially, it is considered routine, if not entirely loving, to lambast a single woman for not having found a husband, and while it can sometimes adopt the desperately teasing lilt of a joke destined to fail, familial pressure only adds another voice to the already haunting chorus questioning your right to exist while single in your thirties. It gives rise to a fight-or-flight reflex within me wherein I invariably choose the ‘fight’ option and am cornered into making a defensive rebuke of the question-asker, while also trumpeting my single and content status—like a deer in the headlights, if that deer were slightly rabid.
I could tell you that I love living alone and being responsible for nobody but myself, I could wax rhapsodically about the unbearably tender intimacy of nurturing yourself or the astounding clarity that can sometimes come with solitude. But the truth is that being single in your thirties isn’t all self-care Sundays and group hugs with your best girlfriends and bell hooks quotes come to life. It can be frustrating, lonely and embarrassingly full of yearning. But single women of a certain age are rarely, if ever, given the space to feel the full spectrum of emotions that being unattached can inspire. There is a pop-culture push, à la Sex and the City, to trumpet your singleness as a badge of pride. Anything resembling unhappiness in single women over thirty is perceived as an admittance of guilt; a silent concurrence with the school of thought that labels you an ‘overeducated and undersexed’ member of the brigade of career-focussed women who have sacrificed lifelong companionship at the altar of personal ambition.
What lies beneath the probing questions from ostensibly well-meaning aunties and terrifying offers from friends to set you up with a degenerate cousin is that society, broadly—and Indian families, specifically—have no idea what to do with or how to react to single women. The life trajectory of a woman is so intrinsically tied to the idea of marriage within the South Asian context that a woman living her life without a man baffles the public imagination. There is a burden of expectation that comes with being a good daughter from a good family, and that expectation consists almost entirely of finding a similarly well-positioned husband and creating good little children to perpetuate this cycle of alleged goodness. There is a prevailing air of disappointment and disapproval that surrounds single Indian women in their thirties, and it is sometimes thick and putrid enough to pierce even the happiest single-by-choice bubbles of existence.
This is not to say anything of the plight faced by people who fall outside the gender binary or heterosexuality. For those who are not waiting for a “mister” at all, the task of trying to live life without bowing to the pressures of mainstream society adopts a Sisyphean quality. There is a plurality of gender and sexual identities that help weave the fabric of society, and suppressing these identities in favour of strict hetero-patriarchy not only fails those that need to be the most supported, BBCbut also quashes any hope of social progress in favour of keeping up with the Joneses.
Even for those that do fall into the narrow confines of what is socially acceptable, the path for single adult women is fraught, hostile and littered with indignities. From apartment buildings in Mumbai refusing to rent to single women (citing their alleged immorality as the cause) to the dismal statistic that working women who state their preference to continue their careers post-marriage receive 22% fewer matches on matchmaking websites or the fact that arranged marriage—which constitutes 97% of the marriages in India—creates an imbalanced power structure that favours men and allows for both the extortion of money from women’s families via dowry and the perpetuation of caste politics.
If I am told one more time to “put myself out there”, I will stage a violent revolt. Every single woman in her thirties has a Rolodex of unsolicited advice that she has received in response to her singledom. For a time following the release of Lori Gottlieb’s 2008 self-help tome, Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough, grown women could be convinced that attraction could be sacrificed in lieu of someone who “would make a good father and husband,” if that woman were “running out of time.” Although we have seemingly graduated from that enlightened school of thought, it doesn’t stop people from telling you to go on more dates or married friends asking if you have “tried Bumble” or your parents emotionally blackmailing you by referring to hypothetical grandchildren. It does not stop people from having the audacity to label you “too picky” or “too introverted” or “too opinionated” or the kind of person that just hasn’t put enough effort into The Cause.
The truth is, I would love to be set up with the right person or to have them magically glide into my life determined to present me with a happily-ever-after. I would love for a serendipitous run-in to turn into the relationship of a lifetime. I would love to swipe right and find Mr. Better-Than-You-Ever-Thought-It-Could-Be. But I am not willing to settle or saddle myself with a person who does not add love or intimacy or emotional value to my life. And I would like to spend the time between now and the moment I meet the inevitable One in peace and not languishing in shame, as prescribed by society.– BBC
Life style
Meet the author rewriting the rules of children’s fiction
Representation matters:
By Ifham Nizam
“There are no books written about pirates with prosthetic limbs, sporting blades, or racing wheelchairs—that is, until now,” says award-winning international children’s author Jann Weeratunga, whose Polly’s Piralympics series is challenging conventional ideas about who gets to be the hero in children’s literature.
For Weeratunga, representation is not simply about placing a disabled character somewhere in a story. It is about putting that character at the centre—leading, competing, winning, making friends, overcoming challenges and, most importantly, having adventures on their own terms.
Her books are designed not merely to be read, but to be experienced. Through interactive pages, children can colour, draw, write and respond to the stories, leaving something of themselves behind as they explore themes, ranging from disability and bullying to friendship, resilience and family.
At the heart of her growing literary brand is Polly’s Piralympics, a series in which disability is not presented as a limitation, but as part of a character’s identity and adventure.
The inspiration came from an unexpected moment during the closing speech of the 2012 London Paralympic Games by Sir Philip Craven. He recalled a young boy looking at an illustration of a pirate with an eye patch, a hook, a parrot and a wooden leg.
When his mother asked who the figure was, the boy replied that because the man had only one leg, “he must be an Olympian.”
The story moved Weeratunga deeply.
That moment of innocent perception—where disability was associated with sporting achievement rather than limitation—sparked the idea of Polly and her extraordinary Piralympic world.
In the series, Polly, a bird-napped African parrot, finds herself bullied in a Scottish pet shop before being rescued by Captain Hake. Their shared one-eyed view of the world becomes the beginning of an unusual friendship. Captain Hake teaches Polly the ways of a pirate, while Polly creates the Fellowship of Pirates and the Pirates Paralympics.
Soon, pirates from around the world are competing in events ranging from three-legged races and climb-the-rigging gymnastics to walk-the-plank diving and even a MasterChef competition.
It is an imaginative world, but behind the humour and adventure lies a serious message about inclusion and leadership.
Weeratunga recalls one school visit that brought home to her exactly why the books mattered.
A student with a prosthetic leg embraced her and said: “Thank you for writing these books for me, Auntie.”
The words left her overwhelmed.
“That was why I had written these books,” Weeratunga reflects.
Her journey towards becoming an author, however, began long before Polly sailed into the world of children’s fiction.
Earlier in her life, Weeratunga was a Scout Leader in the UK, where volunteering became a way of life. She subsequently spent a decade in Sri Lanka, falling in love not only with a Sri Lankan, but with the country itself.
After her husband died just four years into their marriage, she joined five other women to establish a small school in Senarathwela to teach English to those who wanted to learn. Many of her pupils, subsequently, found employment at the newly opened Victoria Golf Course.
When she returned to Sri Lanka in 2025 and revisited the village and golf course, she found a landscape transformed by new roads, homes, shops and businesses. But the people she had taught remained.
“The village is unrecognisable, with new roads, homes, shops and businesses, but my dear pupils were still there as Caddies, Caddy Master and Golf Pro. I was so proud of them,” she says.
Her connection with Sri Lanka deepened further during one of the country’s darkest moments.
On Boxing Day 2005, while holidaying in the UK with her recently widowed mother, Weeratunga was woken by the words: “Something terrible has happened in Sri Lanka.”
She rushed to the television and witnessed the devastating aftermath of the Indian Ocean tsunami.
That very day, she established a non-profit organisation to raise funds and take relief to Sri Lanka. With support from local McDonald’s franchises, schools in Ferndown, the Mayor of Ferndown, freight companies and her friend Mr Wijekoon, a local Grama Niladhari, she helped rebuild lives in Arugam Bay.
The experience was hands-on and deeply personal. A family’s home had been swept away, and days were spent persuading surfers to help construct a future for her adopted family.
A Montessori was established on the hill, within the Buddhist temple grounds, while evenings were spent crafting, building and working with a small but effective generator.
Meals of rice and curry, prepared by the family’s sisters, using provisions donated from Senarathwela, brought the long days to a close.
When Weeratunga returned to the family, in 2025, she was able to see how far they had come.
Today, living in South Africa, she continues to draw inspiration from the landscape around her.
“Travelling—it leaves you speechless and then turns you into a storyteller,” she says, echoing the famous words attributed to Ibn Battuta.
And storytelling has become her way of opening conversations with a new generation.
While Polly’s Piralympics remains the flagship of her children’s publishing brand, Weeratunga’s wider collection explores a range of issues that matter to children and parents.
Terry and the Bully gives children practical and empowering ways to stand up for themselves, transforming a difficult subject into a story through which young readers can explore courage and self-confidence.
In Evie Visiting Grandma, children encounter the sensitive experience of visiting a loved one who now lives in a residential home. Rather than avoiding a potentially difficult subject, the story gently opens the door to conversations about ageing, family and change.
Terry the Toucane explores another universal childhood experience—the challenge and beauty of being different. Its central message is simple: being different should never prevent us from developing deep and lasting friendships.
Then there is Captain Bluebird, a resilient and entertaining adventure exploring what happens when Captain Bluebird receives a brand-new ship.
Across the collection, Weeratunga combines entertainment with meaningful life lessons, while her interactive approach gives children an opportunity to become participants rather than passive readers.
They can colour illustrations, draw pictures and respond to pages, making each reading experience personal.
That approach also gives the books an added value for parents and educators. They can become conversation starters—helping adults discuss subjects that children may find difficult to raise directly.
For Weeratunga, this is part of the larger purpose of her work.
Her books seek to fill a gap in children’s literature where diverse characters are not simply included for the sake of inclusion, but are given agency, personality and leadership.
In Polly’s Piralympics, disabled characters are not watching from the sidelines. They are the stars.
They lead.
They compete.
They win.
They champion their own adventures.
And that, ultimately, is the brand Weeratunga is building: children’s stories in which every child can find a place, a voice and perhaps even a little courage to become the hero of their own story.
Representation matters.
For young readers in Sri Lanka, Weeratunga’s books are now available through Sarasavi Bookshop, Vijitha Yapa Bookshop, M. D. Gunasena and Expo Graphics, Battaramulla.
Life style
An evening where hearts sang as one
By Zanita Careem
Music, laughter and a generous spirit filled Raflfles Hotel Colombo as Heart to Heart sing along brought together a vibrant gathering for an evening of melody, friendship and giving. The elegant ballroom reverberated with familiar lyrics as guests joined in, sang along and simply let their hair down. Adding to the infections atmosphere was the talented Rajiv and Clan, whose lively performance kept the energy soaring and had the gathering singing to some much loved favourites.
Keeping the evening moving with plenty of wit and warmth was the compere Mirzab Sherifdeen who ensured there was never a dull moment between the music, laughter and spontaneous sing-along moments, Guests were also treated to prizes galore adding an extra element of excitement to an already festive evening. There was cheers as winners stepped forward to collect their prizes, while friends and families aplauded and celebrated every winning moment.
Yet beneath all the sparkle was the meaningful purpose of Heart to Heart Trust Fund, founded by Dr. Rajitha Y de Silva and Dr. Ruwan Ekanayake, bringing people together in support of a cause built on compassion and care.
The dedications and the volunteering was evident throughout the evening with their commitment adding a special warmth to this special event.
Adding to the evening’s indulgence was a sumptous spread of cuisine by the Raffles, Hotel with an enticing selectiom that kept guests happily returning for more. From savoury favourites to tempting desserts, the food complemented the festive mood perfectly.
As the final song faded and the evening drew to a close, there was a quiet sense of gratitude. Behind the music, laughter, prizs and beautiful memories was a cause built as compassion, a cause that has continued to touch lives through the dedication of Dr. Rajitha de Silva and everyone who has stood beside him in the journey of Heart to Heart.
And as guests left Raffles Hotel with the last melodies still lingering in the air the most beautiful note of the evening remained – the sound of hearts earning for hearts. At the very heart of Hearts to Heart is Dr. Rajitha whose compassion has become the soul of the initiative. Dr. Rajitha’s work reminds us that medicine is not only about repairing what is broken. It is about giving people the courage to believe in tomorrow. And perhaps that is the greatest gift he offers. This spirit was beautifully reflected throughout the evening.It was a beautiful evening of music, friendship and generosity, with every contribution going towards a worthy cause- keeping alive a legacy built one one simple but powerful belief that every heart deserves a chance to beat on.
- Ramzi Rahaman with friends and family enjoying an evening of music
- Sarath Wimalaratne, Chandra and Bunny Bohoron
- Brigadier Bohoron
- Shanti Fernando shares a warm and happy moment with volunteers, adding to the camaraderie and cheerful spirit
- Shahana, Sherin and Shahareen
- Lakshmie with her graceful moves
- Onitha Gurugalle with Arujana Ranasinghe
- Cardiologist and Senior Consultant Dr. Ruwan Ekanayake
- Dr. Rajitha Y de Silva and Dr. Arunie
- Former Cricketer with spouse
- A guest takes centre stage
Life style
Taste of Ceylon leaves a lasting flavour
Taste of Ceylon opened its doors at Beira Kitchen, Courtyard by Marriott Colombo, on September 3rd; a festival of Southern, Central, Uva and Northern regional food, brought together on one table.
Four Regions, One Unforgettable Table
Each night, guests moved between four distinct culinary worlds. From the South came the deep, coconut-rich flavours of malu abulthiyal and Negombo pork curry with pineapple, alongside a lively fish polla roti action station. The Central province brought Kandalama lake fish, black octopus curry and carrot kalupol; dishes rooted in the region’s lakes and forests. Uva’s table leaned rustic and warming, with village chicken stew, prawn curry with murunga, and a coconut pittu drawing steady queues. And from the North came bold, unmistakable flavours of Jaffna crab curry, Jaffna mutton curry, and a dosai action station that quickly became one of the evening’s most talked-about corners.
Layered around the four regional stations was a spread that told its own story of Sri Lankan hospitality, from belimal herbal welcome drinks and a bread corner stretching from curry leaves rolls to kurakkan viyana rolls, to a dessert corner where watalappan, wood-apple coconut wandu and king coconut jelly sat alongside a full spread of traditional Sri Lankan sweets like kokis, athirasa and aluwa.
What the guests had to say
The feedback on opening night carried a common thread: guests were struck by just how different each region’s food tasted, side by side, on the same table. What could easily have blurred into “just Sri Lankan food” instead came through as four distinct culinary identities; the fire of the North, the coastal warmth of the South, the earthiness of the Central hills, and the rustic comfort of Uva, each unmistakably its own.
A Word from the team
Reflecting on the festival, the team at Courtyard by Marriott Colombo shared that Taste of Ceylon was designed from the start to be more than a menu. It was meant to be an experience guests could travel through, one region at a time, without leaving Beira Kitchen. Judging by the response over the four nights, that’s exactly how it landed.
There were many rave reviews and as the Taste of Ceylon experience at Beira Lake drew to a close, the flavours, aromas and vibrant spirit of Sri Lanka lingered on.
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