Life style
Adolescents of today
by Zanita Careem
Our teenagers have a beautiful shadow to their lives. Today, they are more aware, more health conscious, and they are regulars at the gym, they are also masters of self defence and strike gold in martial arts.
They know everything about protein and carb intake and tons of eating junk food.
They grow to be fitter, thanks to media awareness. They are conscious of substance abuse. At this age reducing weight is tried just for the fun of it. They even have their own ways of spirituality! They realize that God isn’t just in a mosque or temple but also within their hearts. They connect to whatever they need to connect. Romantic relationships are more common – something every spiritual school of thought encourages. Understanding sexual relationships is a chapter that is no longer taboo. It is respected and understood by teenagers with the repercussions it may bring.
Namith Swarnasinghe and her sister Savisha Swarnasinghe from Kandy are living examples of two beautiful teenagers in modern society,
They have a relationship with their own ego and they no longer see it as a mask. Besides that, they share a loving relationship with their family and in all this they are trying to create an identity in every sphere of life and mark and space for themselves. When this generation become the citizens of tomorrow, they will be healthy in body, mind and soul. The quote by Annanis Inn says it all: ‘And the time came that the pain it took to remain in a tight bud was far greater than the pain it took to bloom!’
The two adolescents namely Namith Swarnasinghe and Savisha Swarnasinghe I met spoke about their teen years, how their lives have been shaped by their parents, their education and their life styles.
They are no different to other young people whose lives are saturated by mobile technology and social media, but they never go out of the box.Brought up in a Kandyan conservative family their teenage years were shaped by family values and social ethos.
Our parents are our role models said the tall and swanky Namith and beautiful Savisha who is an icon of beauty. A fashionista in the making Savisha is lovable and pretty and versatile.
How do you feel to be in the millennial generation?
N&S:
Honestly, I think Mil

lennials are a very lucky bunch of people. We’ve got to experience so many things during our short period of existence.We mean we can remember waiting patiently while the cassette rewinds on the VHS player to watch movies. And today we have movies on demand on the palm of my hand at the click of a button. We’ve sent letters, postcards, SMS, MMS and even used telegrams faxes. So, we’ve experienced both sides of the tape so to speak and we think that’s a good thing. There are many changes going on in the world and personally we think it’s a very interesting time to be experience.
– A time of opportunity
and risks
N&S: High risk, high reward. If you quantify the risk, it’s always correlated with competition. So competition is very high, be it from existing players or newcomers. This is a perfect situation as far as we’ve concerned. The higher the stakes the more motivated we are to improve our business and to make sure we carry forward our 70 years of history.
Are u both move buffs who is your favourite icon in cinema
?
N&S:
Oh yes! we both are a big fan of Martin Scorsese and Christopher Nolan. I think Scorsese is a very clean story teller while Nolan has this mesmerizing ability to push the limits of what is and is not possible in film. They’re both artists of the highest order as far as I’m concerned.
– Do you both feel anxiety and depression at any time
N&S:
Karl Marx predicted this long ago. Alienation is unfortunately an inevitable by-product of capitalism, and we are living in the most capitalist time of human history. Also its no longer taboo to say you’re suffering from anxiety or depression. There’s lot of research that has gone into mental health that has proven how harmful it can be if left untreated or neglected. So while we’ve been lucky enough not to through depression, we’ve handled our fair share of anxiety well.
– How do spent your
leisure hours

N&S-
We’ve got several hobbies that keep us busy whenever we have some free time. I love to cook, it’s always been a passion of mine. I also spend time playing my guitar, watching movies and sports.
Are you into serious reading
N& S
. I’m deep down reading Polemicist Rabbit Hole these days. I love reading Richard Dawkins, and Christopher Hitchens and these days I’m reading Jordan Peterson’s books. I like people that question and provide cohesive arguments against the status quo.
The best movies you both enjoy
N&S:
The Dark Knight Arrival
The Terminal
You Dietary plans, are you both conscious of a particular dress code and do you both passionate about specific brands?
S:
– Our diet has always been kind of top priority at home with a little indulgence in our guilty pleasures once in a while. But we have pushed ourself to be more serious about it lately, with my big day approaching. Well, our dress code defines who you are, and yes, quite conscious of it. I love branded stuff; you could say I am obsessed with it.
N&S:
Your schooling in Kandy
We both schooled in Kandy, I went to Hillwood College and my brother went to Trinity. For my higher studies I obtained my degree from the Excelsior University in Albany and my brother pursued his higher studies at the University of London and later at the Chartered Institute of Management Accounting.
Your international exposure in Malaysia
N:
It has been a very interesting experience for me so far. The ability to live in a completely foreign country made me to be independent and broaden my knowledge.Meeting people from different cultures was a benchmark in my career
Your vision for the future?
S:
My vision is to see Sri Lankans designers,artisans, jewellers, designers are well known. Our designs are universally accepted and we hailed from a business family. Our gem industry and gem business are part of our life. We had business in our blood so it was natural for us to follow our father’s footsteps and carry the business forward.
Life style
Rediscovery of Strobilanthes pentandra after 48 years
A Flower Returns From Silence:
Nearly half a century after it slipped into botanical silence, a ghost flower of Sri Lanka’s misty highlands has returned—quietly, improbably, and beautifully—from the folds of the Knuckles mountain range.
In a discovery that blends patience, intuition and sheer field grit, Strobilanthes pentandra, one of Sri Lanka’s most elusive endemic flowering plants, has been rediscovered after 48 years with no confirmed records of its existence in the wild. For decades, it lived only as a name, a drawing, and a herbarium sheet. Until now.
This rare nelu species was first introduced to science in 1995 by renowned botanist J. R. I. Wood, based solely on a specimen collected in 1978 by Kostermans from the Lebnon Estate area. Remarkably, Wood himself had never seen the plant alive. The scientific illustration that accompanied its description was drawn entirely from dried herbarium material—an act of scholarly faith in a plant already vanishing from memory.
From then on, Strobilanthes pentandra faded into obscurity. For 47 long years, there were no sightings, no photographs, no field notes. By the time Sri Lanka’s 2020 National Red List was compiled, the species had been classified as Critically Endangered, feared by many to be lost, if not extinct.
The turning point came not from a planned expedition, but from curiosity.
In October 2025, Induwara Sachinthana, a fourth-year medical student at the University of Peradeniya with a sharp eye for plants, stumbled upon an unfamiliar flowering shrub while trekking in the Knuckles region.
Sensing its importance, he photographed the plant and sent the images for verification, asking a simple but crucial question: Could this be the recently described Strobilanthes sripadensis, discovered from the Sri Pada sanctuary in 2022?
At first glance, the resemblance was striking. But something didn’t quite add up.
Based on the location, morphology, and subtle floral traits, the initial response was cautious: it was neither S. sripadensis nor S. pentandra—or perhaps something entirely new. Yet, as the pieces slowly aligned, and as the habitat details became clearer, the possibility grew stronger: this long-lost species had quietly persisted in the rugged heart of Knuckles.
The confirmation followed through collaborative expertise. Leading Strobilanthes specialist Dr. Renuka Nilanthi Rajapakse, together with Dr. Himesh Dilruwan Jayasinghe and other researchers, carefully examined the evidence. After detailed comparison with historical descriptions and herbarium material, the verdict was clear and electrifying: this was indeed Strobilanthes pentandra.
What followed was not easy.
A challenging hike through unforgiving terrain led to the first live confirmation of the species in nearly five decades. Fresh specimens were documented and collected, breathing life into what had long been a botanical myth.
Adding further weight to the rediscovery, naturalist Aruna Wijenayaka and others subsequently recorded the same species from several additional locations within the Knuckles landscape.
The full scientific credit for this rediscovery rightfully belongs to Induwara Sachinthana, whose curiosity set the chain in motion, and to the dedicated field teams that followed through with persistence and precision.
Interestingly, the journey also resolved an important taxonomic question. Strobilanthes pentandra bears a strong resemblance to Strobilanthes sripadensis, raising early doubts about whether the Sri Pada species might have been misidentified.
Detailed analysis now confirms they are distinct species, each possessing unique diagnostic characters that separate them from each other—and from all other known nelu species in Sri Lanka. That said, as with all living systems, future taxonomic revisions remain possible. Nature, after all, is never finished telling her story.
Although the research paper is yet to be formally published, the team decided to share the news sooner than planned. With many hikers and locals already encountering the plant in Knuckles, its existence was no longer a secret. Transparency, in this case, serves conservation better than silence.
This rediscovery is more than a scientific milestone. It is a reminder of how much remains unseen in Sri Lanka’s biodiversity hotspots—and how easily such treasures can vanish without notice. It also highlights the power of collaboration across generations, disciplines and institutions.
Researchers thanked the Department of Wildlife Conservation and the Forest Department for granting research permissions, and to the many individuals who supported fieldwork in visible and invisible ways.
After 48 years in the shadows, Strobilanthes pentandra has stepped back into the light—fragile, rare, and reminding us that extinction is not always the final chapter.
Sometimes, nature waits.
By Ifham Nizam ✍️
Life style
Desire to connection. understanding sexual health in modern relationships
A conversation about intimacy, belonging and relationships with Dr Yasuni Manikkage
In an age where relationships are shaped as much by emotional awareness as by digital connection, conversations about sexual health are finally stepping out of the shadows.
As Dr. Yasuni Manikkage explains, sexual health is not just a medical issue but a lived experience woven through communication, consent, mental wellbeing and self-respect. Many couples share a home, a bed, even children, yet still feel like “Roommates with responsibilities” rather than lovers, which often signal a lack of emotional safety rather than a lack of physical contact. When desire shifts, they may panic, blame themselves or fear the relationship is dying, instead of recognising that changes in desire are common, understandable, and often transformable with knowledge, honest dialogue, and small daily acts of connection.
Q: Why did you decide to talk about sexual desire and connection now?
A: Because so many couples quietly suffer here. They love each other, share a home, raise children, but feel like “roommates with responsibilities” rather than lovers. They rarely talk about sex openly, so when desire changes, they panic, blame themselves, or assume the relationship is dying. I want people to know shifts in desire are common, understandable, and often treatable with knowledge, communication, and small daily changes.
Q: You say there is an “education gap” in sexual health. What do you mean by that?
A: Most women have never been properly taught about their own sexual anatomy, especially where and how they feel pleasure. Many men, on the other hand, have been left to “figure it out” from pornography, jokes, and guesswork. That’s a terrible training manual for real bodies and real emotions. This gap affects how easily women reach orgasm, how safe they feel in bed, and how satisfied both partners feel in the relationship.
Q: We hear about the “orgasm gap.” Is it really not biological?
A: There are biological factors, yes, but the main gap we see between men’s and women’s orgasm rates in heterosexual relationships comes from communication, knowledge, and what I call “pleasure equity.” In many bedrooms, the script is focused on penetration, speed, and the man’s climax. Women’s pleasure is often treated as optional or “extra.” When couples learn anatomy, slow down, focus on both bodies, and talk about what feels good, that gap narrows dramatically.
Q: Most people think desire should be spontaneous. Is that a myth?
A: It’s one of the biggest myths. Movies show desire as a spark that appears out of nowhere: one glance across the room and suddenly you’re tearing each other’s clothes off. That kind of spontaneous desire does happen, especially early in a relationship. But for many people, especially women, desire is often “responsive”. That means they start feeling desire after some warmth, touch, emotional closeness, or stimulation, not before.
So, if you’re waiting to “feel like it” before you touch or connect, you may wait a very long time. For many, desire comes “after” they start, not before.
Q: How would you scientifically describe sexual desire?
A: Desire is not just a physical urge. It’s a blend of attraction to your partner’s body and personality, emotional connection and feeling cared for, a sense of self-expansion or growth, learning, feeling alive with them, trust and safety, both emotionally and physically. It’s contextual: it changes with stress, health, life stages, and relationship quality. It’s relational: it lives between two nervous systems, not just in one body. And for many, it’s responsive: you get in the mood “after” a hug, a joke, a shower together, not randomly at 3 p.m. on a Tuesday.
Q: You mentioned an “updated sexual response cycle.” What does that look like in real life?
A: Older models suggested a straight line: desire, arousal, orgasm and resolution. That’s tidy, but human beings are messy and complex. Modern understanding is more like a circle or loop. You can enter the cycle at different points: maybe you start with touch, or a feeling of closeness, or even just a decision to connect. Desire doesn’t always come first; sometimes it shows up halfway through.
For example, you may feel tired and not “in the mood,” but you agree to cuddle and share some gentle touch. As you relax and feel appreciated, arousal builds, and then desire appears. That’s normal, not fake.
Q: Are there real gender differences in how desire works?
A: There are common patterns, though individuals vary a lot. Many women tend to enter through emotional intimacy: feeling heard, understood, and safe. Physical touch then wakes up arousal, and desire follows.
Many men more often start with physical attraction or arousal. They may feel desire quickly in response to visual or physical cues, and emotional intimacy can deepen later.
Both patterns are healthy and normal. The problem starts when each partner assumes the other should work exactly like them, and if they don’t, they must be “cold” “needy” or “broken.” Understanding these differences turns conflict into curiosity.
Q: How does desire change as a relationship ages?
A: Think of three broad stages.
stage 1 – Early Attraction (0-6 months): High novelty, strong chemistry, lots of dopamine. You’re discovering each other; desire often feels effortless. stage 2 – Deepening Intimacy (6 months-2 years): You know each other better. The high settles. Desire becomes more linked to emotional closeness. Frequency may drop, and that is “normal”.
stage 3 – Maintenance and Maturity (2-10+ years): Life arrives -work, kids, money, health. Desire usually doesn’t feel automatic. It needs conscious attention, novelty, and emotional safety.
A common mistake is comparing stage 3 desire to Stage 1 and assuming, “we’ve failed.” Actually, you’ve just moved into a different phase that requires new skills.
Q: What are some main things that influence desire?
A:We can think in three layers.
Biological: hormones (testosterone, estrogen), brain chemicals (dopamine, serotonin), medical conditions like diabetes, heart disease, cancer, chronic pain, sleep problems, menopause, and genital issues such as vaginal dryness or pelvic floor pain.
Psychological: negative early sexual experiences, trauma or abuse, body image concerns, low self-esteem, anxiety, depression, and certain mental health conditions.
Relational and social: how safe and respected you feel, attachment style, quality of communication, power imbalances, work and financial stress, caregiving burdens, privacy, and cultural messages that centre on penetration over pleasure. Desire is never “just in your head” or “just in your hormones” – it’s all three interacting.
Q: What tends to kill desire in long-term relationships?
A: Several patterns show up again and again:
Resentment and unresolved conflict – small hurts that never get repaired.
Lack of emotional safety – fear of being judged, rejected, or punished for being vulnerable.
Poor communication – avoiding difficult topics, sarcasm instead of honesty.
Body image shame – feeling unattractive, “too old,” “too fat,” or “not enough.”
Power imbalance -one partner controlling decisions, money, or sex.
Sexual guilt or religious shame messages that sex is dirty, selfish, or only for reproduction.
Stress, burnout, depression -when your nervous system is in survival mode, it doesn’t prioritise pleasure.
You can’t expect desire to flourish in an environment that feels unsafe, unfair, or constantly tense.
Q: And what actually builds desire?
A: Desire thrives in a combination of safety and aliveness.
Emotional intimacy: feeling seen, heard, and valued.
Nervous system calm: your body is relaxed enough to feel pleasure, not just guard against danger.
Open communication: you can talk about wants, limits, and fantasies without mocking or shutting each other down.
Continued growth: doing new things together, seeing new sides of each other, evolving as a team.
I often say: stagnation is desire’s enemy; growth is its ally. Even small adventures -trying a new cafe, dancing in the living room, travelling a different route-can reawaken curiosity.
Q: Can you give couples a simple framework to reconnect?
A: Yes, I often share a six-step framework that’s practical and gentle.
1. Check in: Ask, “How connected do we feel lately?” Not just “How often are we having sex?”
2. Non-sexual touch: Hugs, stroking hair, holding hands – without expecting sex at the end.
3. Novelty: Try something new together: a class, a walk in a different place, a game, a shared hobby.
4. Appreciation: Tell your partner what you notice and value about them, including non-sexual qualities.
5. vulnerability: Share one fear, one hope, or one truth you usually hide.
6. Initiation: Don’t wait for desire to fall from the sky. Gently invite connection; sometimes the mood follows the movement.
You don’t need to do all of this perfectly. Even one or two steps, done consistently, can shift the energy between you.
Q: How can someone tell if their desire problem needs more attention or professional help?
A: some warning signs include:
You feel emotionally distant, even though you still love each other.
Desire has dropped sharply and is tied to stress, shame, or unspoken conflict.
You feel unable to talk about sex without fighting or shutting down.
sex is used to avoid real intimacy, or to keep the peace, rather than to connect.
You feel afraid or ashamed to say what you truly want-or what you don’t want. In these situations, talking to a doctor, a sexual medicine specialist, or a therapist can be very helpful. You are not “broken” for needing support.
Q: Many couples say, “We love each other but there’s no spark.” What do you tell them?
A: I often say, “Let’s first normalise where you are.” If you’ve been together for years, maybe raising children and navigating financial pressures, it’s normal that your desire doesn’t look like the early days. That doesn’t mean your relationship is dying.
usually, you’re in the maintenance phase. Desire is quieter but can be reawakened with intentional effort: scheduling time for each other, bringing in novelty, and rebuilding emotional safety. It’s less about chasing fireworks and more about tending a fire so it doesn’t go out.
Q: what about couples with mismatched desires – one wants sex often, the other rarely?
A: This is extremely common. The mistake is to frame it as “the pursuer is demanding” and “the less-desiring partner is rejecting.” underneath, there are often two different nervous systems trying to feel safe.
one partner might use physical closeness to feel secure and loved. The other might need emotional safety first before their body can relax into physical intimacy. When couples understand this, they stop seeing each other as enemies and start cooperating: “How can we meet ‘both’ our needs, instead of arguing about who is right?”
Q: Many people, especially women, say sex feels like an obligation. What does that signal to you as a doctor?
A: It’s a red flag – not that the person is broken, but that something important is missing. sex should be about connection, pleasure, and mutual choice. when it becomes a duty, I look for:
Emotional disconnection or resentment.
Fear of conflict or abandonment if they say no.
Lack of felt safety or freedom to express preferences.
The solution is not to “force yourself more.” It is to rebuild emotional safety, renegotiate consent and expectations, and often to have very honest conversations about what feels missing or painful.
Q: If you could leave couples with a few key messages about desire and connection, what would they be?
A: I’d highlight four truths:
Desire and emotional intimacy are deeply connected. When you feel safe, loved, and seen, desire has space to grow.
Desire changes across life and relationship stages. That’s normal, not evidence of failure.
Safety is the foundation. without trust and a calm nervous system, no technique or position will fix desire.
You have agency. Through communication, intentional connection, and sometimes professional help, it is possible to revive and reshape your sexual relationship. If you are reading this and thinking, “This sounds like us,” my invitation is simple: start with one honest conversation. Ask your partner, “Where do you naturally enter the cycle -through emotions, touch, or arousal? What helps you feel desire? What do you need from me to feel safe and wanted?”
Those questions, asked with kindness and curiosity, can quietly change the entire trajectory of a relationship.
Life style
Ramazan spirit comes alive at ‘Marhaba’
At Muslim Ladies College
The spirit of Ramadan came alive at the Muslim Ladies as the much-awaited pre-Ramadan sale “Marabha” organised by MLC PPA unfolded at SLEC the event drew students, parents and old girls to a colourful celebration filled with the aromas of traditional delicacies and the buzz of excitement from the buzzling stalls
Behind the seamless flow and refined presentation were Feroza Muzzamil and Zamani Nazeem. Whose dedication and eye for detail elevated the entire occasion. Their work reflected not only efficiency but a deep understanding of the institution’s values. It was an event, reflected teamwork, vision and a shared commitment to doing things so beautifully. The shoppers were treated to an exquisite selection of Abayas, hijabs and modern fashion essentials, carefully curated to blend contemporary trends with classic elegance. Each stall offered unique piece from intricately embroidered dresses to chic modern designs. The event also highlighted local entrepreneurs a chance to support homegrown talent. Traditional Ramazan goods and refreshment added a delighted touch, making it as much a cultural celebration as a shopping experience.
- Endless deals,endless possibilities
- Goods at reasonable prices
- Zamani and Feroza setting the bar high
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