Features

‘Twinkle! Twinkle! Good Sir John …’

Published

3 years ago

2022/12/30

Heard at the Club

Sir John Kotelawala, then Prime Minister visited Galle, with the members of the Airport Club, to play some tennis matches with the members of the Galle Gymkhana Club. Both teams were hosted to lunch by Justice V. T. Panditha Gunawardena, who was then presiding at the Galle Assizes, at the spacious Judge’s Bungalow.

There was a pre-lunch session of baila and Sir John threw out a challenge to the young singers: “Let’s hear you buggers sing all the bailas you know about me!”Then the baila singers began with quite a sober note: “Dudley Senanayake langadhee resignvels,

Sir John ape Premier vuna balaganilla….”

Thereafter they ripped into every baila about Sir John, and needless to say that some of them were quite outrageous, with Sir John clapping and guffawing in gay abandon.

“Hai! Hai!! Sir John giya loka savari….”

This reminds me that after the death of Premier S. W. R. D., a Policeman at Galle sang this baila:

“Dukayi kiya dukayi kiya handai lokaya!”

Aida priyae yanna giye apa duke dama!

Ara asiyathika ratawala kathanayaka

Ma piyaneka garu Bandaranaike.”

(2) Another day, Premier Sir John, while addressing a public meeting at Galle said “If Dhanayaka tries his nonsense with me, I will devour him.”

The following day Dahanayake issued a statement to the effect “At least then Sir John will have a brain in his stomach.”

(3) When W. was MSC for Bible, he was nicknamed the “Bibile Brook” because of his capacity for long speeches and hence the comparison to Tennyson’s Brook, which declared that “men may come and men may go, but I go on forever.”

In 1945 W. spoke for 13 hours making the longest speech in the legislature. (The previous record was 11½ hours by G. G. Ponnambalam).When he continued his talk on the second day it was an open secret that Sir John had damned the Brook by getting Daha’s notes “lifted” during the lunch interval, but the Brook carried on regardless.

(4) When the newly created Air Ceylon made its inaugural flight to Madras, the then Minister of Transport Sir John invited Daha to join it. That was the only time Daha left our shores.He once protested against the rationing of textiles by the Sirimavo Government, by wearing an amude (a loin cloth) to Parliament. He was not allowed to enter the Chamber but hovered there to be photographed. Rumour had it that Sir John was about place (and true to form) was searching for a pair of scissors. Fortunately it was a non-event.

(6) Here is parodist Dahanayaka on Sir John:

“I thought I saw Bubby Akka.

Shouting “Hooi” and “Haai”

I looked again and found it was

Sir John and Chou Enali”

The former rang his bell-eke And Chou said

“Never say die!

“Under the Temple Trees

He loves to lie at ease

And turns the Premier’s post

Into a dancing host.

Come hither, come hither, come hither,

Here shall you see

No policy,

But birds of the same feather”

Twinkle! Twinkle! Good Sir John,

How you’ve fooled our fair Ceylon,

Looking young in spite of age,

When the girls at

“Temple Trees”

Crowd and dance like buzzing bees,

Then you sing your sweetest song,

Twinkle! Twinkle! All night long!

But if you care to see the woe

Of starving men who come and go,

Then you’ll sing a sadder song

And twinkle! Like a wiser John.”

In ceylon’s first Parliament, one of the six nominated Mps – singleton – Salmon was a die-hard old colonialist, and one day, in the course of a speech in the House, he was lamenting the disintegration of the Empire, of which his mother – country was the head.

“For centuries” he wailed “the sun never set on the British Empire.”

Dr. Colvin quipped “That’s because God did not trust the Britisher in the dark”.

(8) Once while making one of his long speeches in Parliament, W. Dahanayaka spoke about the plight of the poor man because of the rising price of textiles, when Singleton – Salmon interrupted with: “But the prices of sarees are coming down.”

“Yes” replied W, “and as the sarees come down sarongs go up!”

(9) Another day castigating the police, in the State Council, W. said that IGP Dowbiggin should be called PIG and not IGP, when an appointed English Member sprang to his feet and demanded indignantly “What do you mean by PIG? “Police Inspector General” replied W. urbanely.

Once when SWRD was speaking in the State Council, a member remarked that the Member for Morawaka Dr. S. A. Wickremasinghe was sleeping. SWRD quipped “Let lying dogs sleep”.

Another day Dr. S. A. Wickremasinghe, the MP Akuressa was speaking on his pet subject of irrigation, when the MP for Wattala Shelton Jayasinghe interrupted him. Dr. S.A. then said “I can impart information to the Hon. Member, but I can’t give him brains to understand it.”

Then the MP for Wattala shot back. “That is quite understandable. How can the Hon. Member part with something that he hasn’t got?” Then in good humour Dr. S.A. said “That’s a good one Shelton” and proceeded with his speech.

Another day, a member related this story. A parliamentary delegation was visiting places of interest in Moscow and was at an old church where the guide showed the delegates an organ, proudly describing it as one of the oldest and most powerful instruments, when a brash young Ceylonese MP asked him in a loud voice, “What is the horse-power?”. A deafening silence followed.

“In 1970, an Act called the Condominium Property Act No. 12 of 1970, was passed in Parliament.

The Act dealt with lands, and buildings, with more than one storey. The Bill was passed without much discussion, and Minister of Housing and Construction at the time. Pieter Kueneman, commented while moving the Third Reading that not many Members took part in the discussion, maybe because they may have been deterred by the fact that the title of the Bill began with the word “condom”.

Here is another club story. Two cyclists were travelling along Anderson Road, engaged in a lively conversation when they were suddenly copped. “I looking why you were riding double breast?” said the policeman. “Ralahamy! I was only trying to overtake my friend, we were not riding abreast”, “I know you riding double abreast, don’t try joking me” said the policeman angrily.

In the circumstances, the only salvation for the two cyclists was to plead guilty, which they did. “Ole right! This time I free. Next time both ride single breast” said the cop.

When we were young children, we were delighted to listen to the stories of Andare, the Royal Court Jester. One such was this story. One day the Queen was desirous of meeting Andare’s wife. Andare then told her that his wife was short of hearing. The Queen then said that she would speak to her as loud as she for could. Back at home, Andare told his wife that the Queen wishes to meet her, adding that she as short of hearing and to speak to her in a loud voice.

When Andare went to the palace with his wife, the Queen engaged ina conversation with her in a loud voice. It soon turned out to be a noise of disturbance with each of them raising their voices. Hearing it the king and the palace officials rushed to the scene to find out what it was all about. And, it did not take long for them to realise that it was one of Andare’s pranks at work.

Several years later, a similar scene was enacted at Galle. A club member was a tourist guide and he used to take tourists to his uncle’s well-stocked jewellery shop and his uncle would give him a percentage of any sale as commission.

As time went by, he began to suspect that his commission was less than it should be, and that his uncle was defrauding him. This suspicion gained ground because his uncle never allowed him to be present during transactions.

One day he took a wealthy tourist to the shop and told his uncle in Sinhala, that the tourist was a little deaf and that he would have to speak loudly. Earlier taking a leaf of Andare’s book, he had told the tourist that his uncle was a bit deaf and that he would have to speak loud.

As was the practice our member guide stood outside the shop while the transaction was going on, but well within hearing distance. And that day he got the correct commission from his uncle, because he knew the exact amount of money that had changed hands!

All News Advertisement

Features

Recruiting academics to state universities – beset by archaic selection processes?

Published

22 hours ago

2026/03/3

Thilina Walpola

by Kaushalya Perera

Time has, by and large, stood still in the business of academic staff recruitment to state universities. Qualifications have proliferated and evolved to be more interdisciplinary, but our selection processes and evaluation criteria are unchanged since at least the late 1990s. But before I delve into the problems, I will describe the existing processes and schemes of recruitment. The discussion is limited to UGC-governed state universities (and does not include recruitment to medical and engineering sectors) though the problems may be relevant to other higher education institutions (HEIs).

How recruitment happens currently in SL state universities

Academic ranks in Sri Lankan state universities can be divided into three tiers (subdivisions are not discussed).

* Lecturer (Probationary)

– recruited with a four-year undergraduate degree. A tiny step higher is the Lecturer (Unconfirmed), recruited with a postgraduate degree but no teaching experience.

* A Senior Lecturer can be recruited with certain postgraduate qualifications and some number of years of teaching and research.

* Above this is the professor (of four types), which can be left out of this discussion since only one of those (Chair Professor) is by application.

State universities cannot hire permanent academic staff as and when they wish. Prior to advertising a vacancy, approval to recruit is obtained through a mind-numbing and time-consuming process (months!) ending at the Department of Management Services. The call for applications must list all ranks up to Senior Lecturer. All eligible candidates for Probationary to Senior Lecturer are interviewed, e.g., if a Department wants someone with a doctoral degree, they must still advertise for and interview candidates for all ranks, not only candidates with a doctoral degree. In the evaluation criteria, the first degree is more important than the doctoral degree (more on this strange phenomenon later). All of this is only possible when universities are not under a ‘hiring freeze’, which governments declare regularly and generally lasts several years.

Problem type 1

– Archaic processes and evaluation criteria

Twenty-five years ago, as a probationary lecturer with a first degree, I was a typical hire. We would be recruited, work some years and obtain postgraduate degrees (ideally using the privilege of paid study leave to attend a reputed university in the first world). State universities are primarily undergraduate teaching spaces, and when doctoral degrees were scarce, hiring probationary lecturers may have been a practical solution. The path to a higher degree was through the academic job. Now, due to availability of candidates with postgraduate qualifications and the problems of retaining academics who find foreign postgraduate opportunities, preference for candidates applying with a postgraduate qualification is growing. The evaluation scheme, however, prioritises the first degree over the candidate’s postgraduate education. Were I to apply to a Faculty of Education, despite a PhD on language teaching and research in education, I may not even be interviewed since my undergraduate degree is not in education. The ‘first degree first’ phenomenon shows that universities essentially ignore the intellectual development of a person beyond their early twenties. It also ignores the breadth of disciplines and their overlap with other fields.

This can be helped (not solved) by a simple fix, which can also reduce brain drain: give precedence to the doctoral degree in the required field, regardless of the candidate’s first degree, effected by a UGC circular. The suggestion is not fool-proof. It is a first step, and offered with the understanding that any selection process, however well the evaluation criteria are articulated, will be beset by multiple issues, including that of bias. Like other Sri Lankan institutions, universities, too, have tribal tendencies, surfacing in the form of a preference for one’s own alumni. Nevertheless, there are other problems that are, arguably, more pressing as I discuss next. In relation to the evaluation criteria, a problem is the narrow interpretation of any regulation, e.g., deciding the degree’s suitability based on the title rather than considering courses in the transcript. Despite rhetoric promoting internationalising and inter-disciplinarity, decision-making administrative and academic bodies have very literal expectations of candidates’ qualifications, e.g., a candidate with knowledge of digital literacy should show this through the title of the degree!

Problem type 2 – The mess of badly regulated higher education

A direct consequence of the contemporary expansion of higher education is a large number of applicants with myriad qualifications. The diversity of degree programmes cited makes the responsibility of selecting a suitable candidate for the job a challenging but very important one. After all, the job is for life – it is very difficult to fire a permanent employer in the state sector.

Widely varying undergraduate degree programmes.

At present, Sri Lankan undergraduates bring qualifications (at times more than one) from multiple types of higher education institutions: a degree from a UGC-affiliated state university, a state university external to the UGC, a state institution that is not a university, a foreign university, or a private HEI aka ‘private university’. It could be a degree received by attending on-site, in Sri Lanka or abroad. It could be from a private HEI’s affiliated foreign university or an external degree from a state university or an online only degree from a private HEI that is ‘UGC-approved’ or ‘Ministry of Education approved’, i.e., never studied in a university setting. Needless to say, the diversity (and their differences in quality) are dizzying. Unfortunately, under the evaluation scheme all degrees ‘recognised’ by the UGC are assigned the same marks. The same goes for the candidates’ merits or distinctions, first classes, etc., regardless of how difficult or easy the degree programme may be and even when capabilities, exposure, input, etc are obviously different.

Similar issues are faced when we consider postgraduate qualifications, though to a lesser degree. In my discipline(s), at least, a postgraduate degree obtained on-site from a first-world university is preferable to one from a local university (which usually have weekend or evening classes similar to part-time study) or online from a foreign university. Elitist this may be, but even the best local postgraduate degrees cannot provide the experience and intellectual growth gained by being in a university that gives you access to six million books and teaching and supervision by internationally-recognised scholars. Unfortunately, in the evaluation schemes for recruitment, the worst postgraduate qualification you know of will receive the same marks as one from NUS, Harvard or Leiden.

The problem is clear but what about a solution?

Recruitment to state universities needs to change to meet contemporary needs. We need evaluation criteria that allows us to get rid of the dross as well as a more sophisticated institutional understanding of using them. Recruitment is key if we want our institutions (and our country) to progress. I reiterate here the recommendations proposed in ‘Considerations for Higher Education Reform’ circulated previously by Kuppi Collective:

* Change bond regulations to be more just, in order to retain better qualified academics.

* Update the schemes of recruitment to reflect present-day realities of inter-disciplinary and multi-disciplinary training in order to recruit suitably qualified candidates.

* Ensure recruitment processes are made transparent by university administrations.

Kaushalya Perera is a senior lecturer at the University of Colombo.

(Kuppi is a politics and pedagogy happening on the margins of the lecture hall that parodies, subverts, and simultaneously reaffirms social hierarchies.)

Features

Talento … oozing with talent

Published

22 hours ago

2026/03/3

Thilina Walpola

Talento: Gained recognition as a leading wedding and dance band

This week, too, the spotlight is on an outfit that has gained popularity, mainly through social media.

Last week we had MISTER Band in our scene, and on 10th February, Yellow Beatz – both social media favourites.

Talento is a seven-piece band that plays all types of music, from the ‘60s to the modern tracks of today.

The band has reached many heights, since its inception in 2012, and has gained recognition as a leading wedding and dance band in the scene here.

The members that makeup the outfit have a solid musical background, which comes through years of hard work and dedication

Their portfolio of music contains a mix of both western and eastern songs and are carefully selected, they say, to match the requirements of the intended audience, occasion, or event.

Although the baila is a specialty, which is inherent to this group, that originates from Moratuwa, their repertoire is made up of a vast collection of love, classic, oldies and modern-day hits.

The musicians, who make up Talento, are:

Prabuddha Geetharuchi:

Geilee Fonseka: Dynamic and charismatic vocalist

Prabuddha Geetharuchi: The main man behind the band Talento

(Vocalist/ Frontman). He is an avid music enthusiast and was mentored by a lot of famous musicians, and trainers, since he was a child. Growing up with them influenced him to take on western songs, as well as other music styles. A Peterite, he is the main man behind the band Talento and is a versatile singer/entertainer who never fails to get the crowd going.

Geilee Fonseka (Vocals):

A dynamic and charismatic vocalist whose vibrant stage presence, and powerful voice, bring a fresh spark to every performance. Young, energetic, and musically refined, she is an artiste who effortlessly blends passion with precision – captivating audiences from the very first note. Blessed with an immense vocal range, Geilee is a truly versatile singer, confidently delivering Western and Eastern music across multiple languages and genres.

Chandana Perera (Drummer):

His expertise and exceptional skills have earned him recognition as one of the finest acoustic drummers in Sri Lanka. With over 40 tours under his belt, Chandana has demonstrated his dedication and passion for music, embodying the essential role of a drummer as the heartbeat of any band.

Harsha Soysa:

(Bassist/Vocalist). He a chorister of the western choir of St. Sebastian’s College, Moratuwa, who began his musical education under famous voice trainers, as well as bass guitar trainers in Sri Lanka. He has also performed at events overseas. He acts as the second singer of the band

Udara Jayakody:

(Keyboardist). He is also a qualified pianist, adding technical flavour to Talento’s music. His singing and harmonising skills are an extra asset to the band. From his childhood he has been a part of a number of orchestras as a pianist. He has also previously performed with several famous western bands.

Aruna Madushanka:

(Saxophonist). His proficiciency in playing various instruments, including the saxophone, soprano saxophone, and western flute, showcases his versatility as a musician, and his musical repertoire is further enhanced by his remarkable singing ability.

Prashan Pramuditha:

(Lead guitar). He has the ability to play different styles, both oriental and western music, and he also creates unique tones and patterns with the guitar..

Features

Special milestone for JJ Twins

Published

22 hours ago

2026/03/3

Thilina Walpola

Twin brothers Julian and Jason Prins

The JJ Twins, the Sri Lankan musical duo, performing in the Maldives, and known for blending R&B, Hip Hop, and Sri Lankan rhythms, thereby creating a unique sound, have come out with a brand-new single ‘Me Mawathe.’

In fact, it’s a very special milestone for the twin brothers, Julian and Jason Prins, as ‘Me Mawathe’ is their first ever Sinhala song!

‘Me Mawathe’ showcases a fresh new sound, while staying true to the signature harmony and emotion that their fans love.

This heartfelt track captures the beauty of love, journey, and connection, brought to life through powerful vocals and captivating melodies.

It marks an exciting new chapter for the JJ Twins as they expand their musical journey and connect with audiences in a whole new way.

Their recent album, ‘CONCLUDED,’ explores themes of love, heartbreak, and healing, and include hits like ‘Can’t Get You Off My Mind’ and ‘You Left Me Here to Die’ which showcase their emotional intensity.

Readers could stay connected and follow JJ Twins on social media for exclusive updates, behind-the-scenes moments, and upcoming releases:

Instagram: http://instagram.com/jjtwinsofficial

TikTok: http://tiktok.com/@jjtwinsmusic

Facebook: http://facebook.com/jjtwinssingers

YouTube: http://youtube.com/jjtwins