Features

Manourie Muttetuwegama, a personal memoir

Published

5 years ago

2021/08/1

by Manik de Silva

My grandfather, the late Dr. O.A. de Silva of Sisira, Randombe, Ambalangoda, chose two phonetically similar but fairly uncommon names for his two elder sons. My father was Walwin Arnold and loku baappa was Colvin Reginald. Colvin married much earlier than thaththa and thus all three of his children were older than my parents’ five.

The brood at Pendennis Avenue (now Abdul Caffoor Mawatha), Kollupitiya, were Manouri Kokila, Shireen Mohini and Nalina Visvajit. None of them, however, were ever called by their given names. Manouri was Toonie (sometimes Toonie Man or TM to her father), Shireen was Podi Toot (often PT to Colvin) and NV was Koiman (but never KM). None of us cousins (22 in all on our paternal side) ever figured out or learned how or why these nicknames were coined. So Manouri – a most unusual name then and possibly the progenitor off all Manouris (or Manoris who came since) was always Toonie akka to all her cousins.

The nicknames were not the only difference between us cousins. Colvin’s children called their parents mummy and daddy while to the rest of us, our’s were amma and thaththa. The children of that family, as I remember, had more liberties than us due to Colvin’s easy going nature and very busy professional and political life. Perhaps kudamma was less indulgent notwithstanding her kindness and hospitality. My father was the only person who, as I recall, she did not serve at her table because he had made it very clear that he must serve himself!

Manouri was both an extremely attractive child and later a beautiful woman who, her father, particularly, doted on. So also did her grandfathers on both sides. Both grandmothers died early. I clearly remember loku bappa once taking her to England as a child, maybe he wanted to to show off his daughter to his British friends (Both Walwin and Colvin were educated at the London University after a brief stint at the then University College here). When they returned, loku bappa with his penchant for a good story, used to regale us with their experiences on that trip. One I vividly recall was “whenever we went to a restaurant, Toonie’s eye unerringly went to the most expensive dish on the menu.”

Very few remember the tragedies Toonie akka went through during her 85 years, She bore them all stoically, never brooded over misfortunes and always presented a cheerful face to the world. Little known is the accident she suffered on her bicycle either as a child or early teen. She had cycled to our home on Charles Way and was going back to Pendennis Avenue when she was hit by an overtaking car on the Galle Road and was unconscious for 14 days. It was “touch and go” as her brother reminded me after her death.

He also told me a story I did not know before. Kudamma was at her bedside when Toonie akka regained consciousness. Perhaps having being vaguely aware of those nursing her during her coma, she had asked “Why are you wearing my mother’s clothes?” when she opened her eyes, having mistaken her mother for one of the nurses. I remember as a child counting the days of Toonie akka lying unconscious on a hospital bed. It was a traumatic time for the whole family but she soon bounced back fully recovered.

She was one of the two cleverest girls a Visakha Vidyalaya of her time. The other was Kumari Wickramasuriya, my mother’s eldest sister’s daughter. I remember her and Toonie akka in the early fifties going together in a six-member contingent for a Girl Guide event in Australia. Four of the girls in that group were from Visakha. I also remember viewing a Visakha school play in which Toonie akka was acting, playing the part of a king, when she dropped her crown on stage. Not for her the indignity of bending down to retrieve it. She laughingly ad libbed a line clean off the script by describing herself as “a king without a crown!” We all thought that was brilliant.

Her parents, undoubtedly anxious too see her qualify as a barrister like her father sent her to the UK after she had completed her secondary education. She was called to the bar at Lincoln’s Inn like her father before her and her brother and daughter after.

Koiman too was shipped off to London for law studies although he always had a penchant for mechanical engineering (and still does). His mother wouldn’t hear of him doing anything but law and Colvin, sadly, did not intervene. Koiman practiced his profession very briefly and has remained a non-practicing advocate/barrister for most of his life. International phone calls were few and far between in those days and I recall one to Toonie akka on one rare occasion, when she said she was busy cooking a pork chop for her brother. For the past several years, after his return to then Ceylon, he’s been a very strict vegetarian and no fish, flesh or fowl is permitted in his house.

I mentioned earlier here that Toonie akka, in her lifetime, took several body blows which would have felled lesser mortals. She was only two years old when Colvin was jailed under the colonial Defence of India Regulations, broke jail and went underground in India for four years. That was a traumatic time for the young family. After her bicycle accident, the second blow struck when Sarath Muttetuwegama, whom she married was killed in a motor car accident near Ratnapura in1986. Then she tragically lost their son, Maithri, a few years later. Thereafter she was diagnosed with cancer.

I remember going to Sarath’s ancestral home at Kuruwita after his tragic death. Toonie akka hugged me, and told me, “Malli, when I was small, mummy took me to K.C. Nadarajah’s (a well known lawyer of the day) home where there was a vakyam (ola leaf) reader from India. He read mine and told me ‘you will have a very happy marriage for 19 years and after that what…’ He didn’t say what that what was then, but it’s now 19 years since we married.” Perhaps she believed that Sarath’s death was foreordained.

There was also a time when Sarath, then a proctor who later qualified as an advocate, was engaged to Manouri when Colvin saw him on his feet in a courtroom. He told me: “I’m not saying this because he’s marrying my daughter, but his cross-examination was exceptional.” Sarath did as well in his profession as a criminal lawyer as he did in politics – among the best parliamentarians I’ve seen during long years as a lobby correspondent. He was much loved in the Sabaragamuwa Province where he was Sarath appo to the people. Prime Minister Premadasa once publicly said, perhaps to dig at Anura B, “Sarath Muttetuwegama is the real Leader of the Opposition, not Anura Bandaranaike.”

During her later years Toonie akka suffered an accident at the Yala National Park when she was in the deep south on human rights work. Her finger accidentally caught in a deck chair strut as she sat down, and part of it got sliced off. She was taken to the Tissamaharama hospital with the slice digit in ice in a sirisiri bag and later rushed to Colombo. But reattachment was not possible and she lived with that for the rest of her life. In those years she walked with a stick with great panache. She had inherited a lot of her father’s mannerism but not his booming voice. She never failed to ring me up and congratulate me on the paper I now edit whenever she had enjoyed an issue, and that was often.

It may be worth retelling an anecdote relating to her life and mine. That happened when she took an Ll.M. degree from London University after her first degree. I was then a raw cub reporter on the old Ceylon Observer. Her maternal uncle (mother’s brother), Dr. S.L. de Silva (husband of the well known educator Dr. Wimala de Silva), then Director of the Ceylon Technical College, phoned me and said I should write a paragraph of Manouri being the first Ceylonese woman to earn an Ll.M. degree. I wrote a news paragraph front-paged in the Sunday Observer.

When I went to work next morning, a woman subeditor on our staff said I had published a false claim and mentioning another lady lawyer who she said had an LlM, I was terrified. My editor, the redoubtable Denzil Pieris, called me up and said the subeditor concerned had complained to him and was spreading the story around the office. He said had told her that if there was a valid complaint, he should be told so by letter. “Manouri’s Colvin’s daughter. I bet I’ll never get that letter,” Denzil said. “In any case that degree was from an American University called Colgate which to us here is a brand of toothpaste!” he told me to my great relief.

A little known part of her life was that she was a temple-goer. Sunil Rodrigo, chairman of the Associated Newspapers of Ceylon Ltd. (ANCL) during my Daily News days, who lived on Isipathana Mawatha, once told me that his wife, Thilaka, was deeply impressed seeing Toonie akka walk to the Isipathanaramaya off and on. Mrs. Rodrigo didn’t associate somebody like Manourie with temple going.

Let me conclude this narrative with the time Lake House paid me to resign, having moved me out of my job as editor of the Daily News for14 years to a ‘nothing to do’ position as the company’s editorial consultant about a year earlier. I was kept twiddling my thumbs doing nothing and spent my time writing articles for the foreign press. But that’s another story. Toonie akka was then on the Lake House board and she told me that the then Media Minister, Mangala Samaraweera, who wanted me out, did not know our connection.

“I told him you were my malli,” she said but that was to no avail. She also told me that the then chairman and another director used to whisper to each other, keeping her out of the conversation when my dismissal was discussed at board meetings. So I left Lake House after nearly 40 years of service when Manouri was on the board of ANCL, then under government control. It turned out best for me, given that I was paid to go rather than having to work under conditions which would have certainly compelled my resignation.

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Features

A long-running identity conflict flares into full-blown war

Published

7 hours ago

2026/03/5

Sahan Weerasooriya

Ayatollah Ali Khamenei / President Donald Trump

It was Iran’s first spiritual head of state, the late Ayatollah Khomeini, who singled out and castigated the US as the ‘Great Satan’ in the revolutionary turmoil of the late seventies of the last century that ushered in the Islamic Republic of Iran. The core issue driving the long-running confrontation between Islamic Iran and the West has been religious identity and the seasoned observer cannot be faulted for seeing the explosive emergence of the current war in the Middle East as having the elements of a religious conflict.

The current crisis in the Middle East which was triggered off by the recent killing of Iranian spiritual head of state Ayatollah Ali Khamenei in a combined US-Israel military strike is multi-dimensional and highly complex in nature but when the history of relations between Islamic Iran and the West, read the US, is focused on the religious substratum in the conflict cannot be glossed over.

In fact it is not by accident that US President Donald Trump resorts to Biblical language when describing Iran in his denunciations of the latter. Iran, from Trump’s viewpoint, is a primordial source of ‘evil’ and if the Middle East has collapsed into a full-blown regional war today it is because of the ‘evil’ influence and doings of Iran; so runs Trump’s narrative. It is a language that stands on par with that used by the architects of the Iranian revolution in the crucial seventies decade.

In other words, it is a conflict between ‘good’ and ‘evil’ and who is ‘good’ and who is ‘evil’ in the confrontation is determined mainly by the observer’s partialities and loyalties which may not be entirely political in kind. It should not be forgotten that one of President Trump’s support bases is the Christian Right in the US and in the rest of the West and the Trump administration’s policy outlook and actions should not be divorced from the needs of this segment of supporters to be fully made sense of.

The reasons for the strong policy tie-up between Rightist administrations in the US in particular and Israel could be better comprehended when the above religious backdrop is taken into consideration. Israel is the principal actor in the ‘Old Testament’ of the Bible and is seen as ‘the Chosen People of God’ and this characterization of Israel ought to explain the partialities of the Republican Right in particular towards Israel. Among other things, this partiality accounts for the strong defence of Israel by the US.

For the purposes of clarity it needs to be mentioned here that the Bible consists of two parts, an ‘Old’ and ‘New Testament’ , and that the ‘New Testament’ or ‘Message’ embodies the teachings of Jesus Christ and the latter teachings are seen as completing and in a sense giving greater substance to the ‘Old Testament’. However, Judaism is based mainly on ‘Old Testament’ teachings and Judaism is distinct from Christianity.

To be sure, the above theological explanation does not exhaust all the reasons for the war in the Middle East but the observer will be allowing an important dimension to the war to slip past if its importance is underestimated.

It is not sufficiently realized that the Iranian Islamic Revolution of 1979 utterly changed international politics and re-wrote as it were the basic parameters that must be brought to bear in understanding it. So important is the Islamic factor in contemporary world politics that it helped define to a considerable degree the new international political order that came into existence with the collapsing of the Cold War and the disintegration of the USSR .

Since the latter developments ‘political Islam’ could be seen as a chief shaping influence of international politics. For example, it accounts considerably for the 9/11 calamity that led to the emergence of fresh polarities in world politics and ushered in political terrorism of a most destructive kind that is today disquietingly visible the world over.

It does not follow from the foregoing that Islam, correctly understood, inspires terrorism of any kind. Islam proclaims peace but some of its adherents with political aims interpret the religion in misleading, divisive ways that run contrary to the peaceful intents of the faith. This is a matter of the first importance that sincere adherents of the faith need to address.

However, there is no denying that the Islamic Revolution in Iran of 1979 has been over the past decades a great shaper of international politics and needs to be seen as such by those sections that are desirous of changing the course of the world for the better. The revolution’s importance is such that it led to US political scientist Dr. Samuel P. Huntingdon to formulate his historic thesis that a ‘Clash of Civilizations’ is upon the world currently.

If the above thesis is to be adopted in comprehending the principal trends in contemporary world politics it could be said that Islam, misleadingly interpreted by some, is pitting a good part of the Southern hemisphere against the West, which is also misleadingly seen by some, as homogeneously Christian in orientation. Whereas, the truth is otherwise. The West is not necessarily entirely synonymous with Christianity, correctly understood.

Right now, what is immediately needed in the Middle East is a ceasefire, followed up by a negotiated peace based on humanistic principles. Turning ‘Spears into Ploughshares’ is a long gestation project but the warring sides should pay considerable attention to former Iranian President Mohammad Khatami’s memorable thesis that the world needs to transition from a ‘Clash of Civilizations’ to a ‘Dialogue of Civilizations’. Hopefully, there would emerge from the main divides leaders who could courageously take up the latter challenge.

It ought to be plain to see that the current regional war in the Middle East is jeopardising the best interests of the totality of publics. Those Americans who are for peace need to not only stand up and be counted but bring pressure on the Trump administration to make peace and not continue on the present destructive course that will render the world a far more dangerous place than it is now.

In the Middle East region a durable peace could be ushered if only the just needs of all sides to the conflict are constructively considered. The Palestinians and Arabs have their needs, so does Israel. It cannot be stressed enough that unless and until the security needs of the latter are met there could be no enduring peace in the Middle East.

Features

The art and science of communicating with your little child

Published

7 hours ago

2026/03/5

Sahan Weerasooriya

The two input gateways of communication, sight and sound, are quite well developed at birth. In fact, the auditory system becomes functional around 24 weeks in the womb, and the normal newborn can hear quite well after birth. However, the newborn’s vision is a little blurry at birth, and the baby sees the world in shades of grey, while being able only to focus on things 20 to 30 cm (8–12 inches) away. Coincidentally, this is perhaps the exact distance to a mother’s face during breastfeeding. By 2-3 months, there are colour vision capabilities and the ability to track. By 5-8 months, there is depth perception, and by 12 months, there is adult clarity of vision.

By the time a child turns five, his or her brain has already reached 90% of its adult size. This astonishing physical growth is not just happening on its own; it is, to a certain extent, fuelled by experience, and the most vital experience a young child can have is communication with his or her parents.

Modern developmental neuroscience has shifted our understanding of how children learn. We used to think babies were passive sponges, slowly absorbing the world. We now know they are active characters from day one, constantly seeking interaction to build the architecture of their minds. This architecture is not built by apps, vocabulary flashcards, or educational television. It is built through simple, loving, back-and-forth interactions with anyone they come across, but mostly their parents.

The Foundation: Serve and Return (0–12 Months)

Communication with an infant from birth to one year of age begins long before they speak their first word. In the first year, the goal is to master a phenomenon called Serve and Return. This is a basic scenario picked up from the game of tennis. At the start of each game of a set in tennis, a player serves, and the opponent returns the serve. Just imagine a tennis match, where a baby “serves” by making a sound, making eye contact, reaching for a toy, or crying. The job of anyone in the vicinity, who very often are the parents of the baby, is to “return” the ball. If they babble, you babble back. If they point at a cat, you look and say, “Yes, that’s a furry cat!” This simple act does two things. The first is Brain Building, which creates and strengthens neural pathways in the language and emotional centres of the brain. The other is Emotional Security, a thing which teaches a baby that he or she has some help in the learning processes. The baby absorbs the notion that when he or she signals a need, his or her world will respond. This forms the basis of a secure attachment. Scientists have advocated that during this stage, people, especially the parents of a baby, should embrace what is called ‘parentese’. It is the use of a somewhat high-pitched, exaggerated voice. Research has shown that babies pay more attention to parentese than to regular adult speech, helping them to map the sounds of their native language more quickly.

The Language Explosion: Toddlers (1–3 Years)

When a child starts speaking words, the game changes considerably and quite profoundly. This period is defined by a rapid increase in his or her vocabulary and the beginning of grammar. It is very important to narrate everything. The people around, especially the parents, need to become kind of sports commentators for your life. While dressing them, one could say, “First we put on the red sock. After that, we put the other red sock on your left foot.” What we are doing by this is to give them the labels for the world they see.

It is also important to expand, but not truly correct, whatever the child says. If a toddler points to a car and says “Car!”, don’t just say “Yes.” Expand on it: “Yes, that is a big, fast, red car!” You are adding a new vocabulary and grammatical structure through a natural process. If the child says “Me go,” respond with, “Yes, you are going!” rather than correcting and saying “No…, you should say ‘I am going’.”

Toddlers love reading the same book, even one hundred times. While it may be tedious for those around the baby, it is important to realise that such repetition is vital for their learning. They are predicting what comes next, which is a core cognitive skill.

The Preschooler: Building Stories and Logic (3–5 Years)

By age three, the focus shifts from “what” to “why.” Preschoolers are beginning to understand complex emotions, time, and causality. This is the age at which it is best to ask questions which require thought and understanding. Such indirect open-ended questions would sound like “What was the best part of the park today?” or “How do you think that character in the story is feeling?“

A preschooler’s world is full of “big feelings” they cannot yet manage. When they are upset because they cannot have a cookie, avoid saying “Don’t cry over nothing.” Instead, name the emotion: “Don’t cry, you can have a cookie after dinner“. This teaches them emotional literacy. Parents and others around in the home could share stories about when they were little, or make up fantasy tales together. Storytelling teaches sequential logic (beginning, middle, end) and strengthens their imagination.

The Absolute Master Class: Learning Through Play

If communication is the fuel for brain development, play is the engine. For a child under five, play is not a break from learning; play is learning. It is how they explore physics (stacking blocks), mathematics (sorting shapes), social dynamics (sharing toys), and language (pretend play). We can boost their development exponentially by weaving communication into their play.

When a child is playing with blocks, dough, or puzzles, they are building fine motor skills and spatial awareness. It is also useful to use three-dimensional words: “Can you put the blue block on top of the red one?” “The puzzle piece is next to your knee.” One could also ask them to describe the texture: “Is the dough soft or hard?“

Pretend play, such as acting as a doctor, an engineer, a chef, or a superhero, is one of the most cognitively demanding things a child can do. It requires them to understand symbolic thought and to take on another person’s perspective. Join their world as a supporting character, not the director. If they are the doctor, ask, “Doctor, my teddy bear’s tummy hurts. What should I do?” This encourages them to use vocabulary relevant to the scenario and practice complex social problem-solving.

Playing with water, sand, slime, or safe food products allows children to process sensory information. This is the perfect time for descriptive vocabulary. Use contrasting words: wet/dry, hot/cold, sticky/smooth, loud/quiet.

A few special words for parents. You do not need an expensive degree or specialised toys to build your child’s brain. The most powerful tool you have is your own responsiveness. Modern science tells us that the basic recipe for a thriving child is simple: Look at them when they signal you. Respond with warmth and words. Narrate their world and Join their play.

You are not just talking to your child; you are building his or her future, even via just one conversation at a time. So, go on talking to your child and even make him or her a real-life chatterbox.

Dr B. J. C. Perera

MBBS(Cey), DCH(Cey), DCH(Eng), MD(Paediatrics), MRCP(UK), FRCP(Edin), FRCP(Lond), FRCPCH(UK), FSLCPaed, FCCP, Hony. FRCPCH(UK), Hony. FCGP(SL)

Specialist Consultant Paediatrician and Honorary Senior Fellow, Postgraduate Institute of Medicine, University of Colombo, Sri Lanka.

Features

Promoting our beauty and culture to the world

Published

7 hours ago

2026/03/5

Sahan Weerasooriya

Tourism is very much in the news these days and it’s certainly a good sign to see lots of foreigners checking out Sri Lanka.

With this in mind, Ruki’s Model Academy & Agency recently had a spectacular event to select Mrs. Tourism Sri Lanka in order to promote Sri Lanka in the international scene.

Nimesha Premachandra was crowned Mrs. Tourism Sri Lanka 2026.

She says she owes her success to Ruki (Rukmal Senanayake), the National Director and model trainer, and personality and advocacy trainer Tharaka Gurukanda.

Nimesha is a school teacher by profession, an actress and TV presenter by passion, and an entrepreneur by spirit.

She believes in balancing grace with purpose, and using her platform to inspire women, while promoting the beauty and culture of Sri Lanka to the world. And this is how our Chit-Chat went:

Nimesha Premachandra: Mrs. Tourism Sri Lanka 2026

01. How would you describe yourself?

I am a passionate, disciplined, and people-oriented person. I love learning, performing, and guiding others, especially young minds, through education.

02. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

I would probably try to be less self-critical and allow myself to celebrate achievements more often.

03. If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?

Nothing major. I am grateful for my family’s love and support, which has shaped who I am today.

04. Is Mrs. Tourism Sri Lanka your very first pageant?

No. I have been part of pageants before, but Mrs. Tourism Sri Lanka is very special because it represents purpose, culture, and global representation.

05. What made you take part in this contest?

I wanted to represent Sri Lanka internationally and use this platform to promote tourism, culture, and women’s empowerment.

06. Obviously, you must be excited about participating in the grand finale, in Vietnam; any special plans for this big event?

Yes, I am extremely excited. My focus is to showcase Sri Lankan elegance, hospitality, and authenticity, while building meaningful connections with participants from around the world.

07. How do you intend promoting tourism, in Sri Lanka, during your rein?

I plan to highlight Sri Lanka’s diverse experiences in culture, heritage, wellness, nature, and local hospitality through media appearances, digital storytelling, and tourism collaborations.

08. School?

Kaluthara Balika. School life played a big role in shaping me. I actively participated in sports and performing arts, which later helped me build confidence as an actress and presenter.

09. Happiest moment?

Being crowned Mrs. Tourism Sri Lanka 2026 and seeing the pride in my family’s eyes – definitely one of my happiest moments.

10. What is your idea of perfect happiness?

Peace of mind, good health, and being surrounded by the people I love while doing work that has meaning.

11. Which living person do you most admire?

I most admire Angelina Jolie because she beautifully balances her work as an actress with meaningful humanitarian efforts. She uses her global platform to support refugees, advocate for human rights, and inspire women to be strong, compassionate, and independent.

12. Which is your most treasured possession?

My memories and experiences because they remind me how far I’ve come, and keep me grounded.

13. Your most embarrassing moment?

Like everyone, I’ve had small on-stage mishaps, but they always taught me to laugh at myself and move forward confidently.

14. Done anything daring?

Participating in pageants while balancing teaching, media work, and family life has been one of the boldest and most rewarding decisions I’ve made.

Keen to use her title to promote Sri Lanka globally

15. Your ideal vacation?

A peaceful destination surrounded by nature; somewhere I can relax, reconnect, and experience local culture.

16. What kind of music are you into?

I enjoy soft, soulful music because it helps me relax and stay inspired.

17. Favourite radio station:

I enjoy stations that blend good music with meaningful conversation and positive energy.

18. Favourite TV station:

Sri Lanka Rupavahini Corporation. It’s where it all began for me. It played a significant role in my journey as a TV presenter and helped shape my confidence and passion for media.

19 What would you like to be born as in your next life?

Someone who continues to inspire others because making a positive impact is what matters most.

20. Any major plans for the future?

I hope to expand my work in media and entrepreneurship while continuing my role as an educator and using my title to promote Sri Lanka globally.