The Ashes in Australia in recent times has been a one-way street, with England repeatedly finding themselves on the wrong side of the traffic. In 2007 they were steamrollered 5-0; in 2014 another whitewash followed. The last two tours, in 2018 and 2022, ended 4-0. This time around, too, England appear to be staring down the barrel unless someone conjures up an Ian Botham-esque rescue act. In 1981, in what came to be known as Botham’s Ashes, England were teetering on the brink before their most charismatic cricketer turned the series on its head.

Ironically, this was England’s best shot at winning an Ashes series in Australia for decades. On paper, they had ticked most of the boxes. They had unearthed a couple of fast bowlers capable of matching Australia’s pace, boasted a fit all-rounder and inspirational leader in Ben Stokes and arrived brimming with confidence. Then, almost inexplicably, they pressed the self-destruct button from day one. By unleashing Bazball — a high-octane, take the game by the scruff of the neck approach that thumbed its nose at tradition — England challenged the game’s old order. The problem was, it backfired spectacularly. Heading into the third Test in Adelaide, there is a real danger that the Boxing Day Test in Melbourne and the New Year Test in Sydney will be reduced to dead rubbers.

Bazball had worked, no question about that — but largely against soft opposition. Pathum Nissanka’s sublime hundred at The Oval last year, which powered Sri Lanka to a rare Test win in England, was a case in point. England had made life easier for the visitors. In seaming conditions, when the ball was jagging around corners, their batting resembled a drunken sailor hitting the streets — all bravado, little judgment.

There was, undeniably, an air of arrogance about England’s approach. And as the old adage goes, pride comes before a fall and this has been a mighty tumble.

England had their moments in the first Test in Perth. They were ahead of the game going into the lunch break on day two. Test cricket in Perth nowadays is no longer played at the old WACA, that cauldron of pace and bounce. The Optus Stadium is an architectural marvel, bristling with state-of-the-art facilities, but it remains a notoriously tough place to bat in the opening days. England chose to ignore that reality. Convinced their aggressive methods could trump history and conditions, they believed they could bludgeon their way out of trouble. It was a grave miscalculation.

Lahiru Kumara, Sri Lanka’s fast bowler, summed it up neatly last year in England when, after dismissing a free-wheeling batter in seaming conditions, he asked: “Do you think this is T20 cricket?” That question has echoed loudly in Australia. What might work on England’s smaller grounds is a recipe for disaster on Australia’s vast expanses, where mistimed shots die in the deep and bowlers are rewarded for patience. How England failed to grasp such a basic truth defies comprehension.

England’s defiance of common sense extended beyond tactics. Take the case of Jamie Smith. He represents Surrey in First Class cricket but does not keep wickets for them; that job is handled by the reliable Ben Foakes, while Smith plays as a specialist batter. Yet at Test level, Smith is deemed good enough to don the gloves for England. It is the sort of bold call that may pass muster against fragile opposition, but against a hardened Australian side it left England exposed.

After the humiliation in Australia four years ago, heads rolled in England. There is a sense of déjà vu about this tour, with history threatening to repeat itself. England arrived believing they could change the script with bravado alone. Instead, they have been hoist by their own petard — undone not by lack of talent, but by an arrogance that refused to play the situation.

by Rex Clementine