The 6th of December marks the sixth solar cycle since my adored life partner, Dr Malwattage Josephine Sarojini Perera (née Peeris), left this mortal world. Six years have elapsed; a period characterised by a searingly perpetual heartache. However, her inspiring influence is not diminished by the passage of time, and her memory has become more burnished and sublimely potent. It has transformed from a painful void into a sparkling, indestructible legacy that fortifies the hearts of all who were privileged to share her path.

The abyss left by her departure is multitudinous for all of us, including those who benefited from her professional dedication. Nevertheless, the consciousness of her magnificent journey, a spectacular 72 years, two months, and 11 days on this planet Earth, remains as a seamless record of a unique chronicle. It was the radiance of her inner spirit that rendered her truly peerless. She epitomised the beautiful words of one of my favourite Sri Lankan lady singers, “Beauty is how you feel inside; you glow from within.” Sarojini was a woman of monumental dignity and benevolence, whose serene, consistent luminosity brought a radiance into every room she entered. Her smile was a glorious spectacle of her lovely inner human nature; a pure expression of her soul’s integrity. That spectacularly radiant smile epitomised the immortal words of the beautiful song by Nat King Cole, “Smile though your heart is aching, smile even though it is breaking, when there are clouds in the sky, you will get by.”

Throughout her tenure on Mother Earth, she embodied the highest form of selfless service, dedicating her energies wholly to our family unit, her relatives, and all her acquaintances. She served her patients with an unreserved commitment, functioning as the very milieu of abiding reassurance for them. Her chosen field in medicine was one of profound challenges and pressing needs. She primarily worked ever so tirelessly with individuals afflicted and affected by Sexually transmitted Diseases, HIV and AIDS. They were a cohort frequently marginalised, ostracised, and terribly wounded by societal judgment. Yet, this extraordinary woman approached her work with limitless compassion and an intrinsic, deep-seated sense of humanitarian duty. She held an irrefutable conviction that beyond the stark finality of any medical diagnosis, there was a human being whose entitlement to honour, consideration, respect and warmth was absolute.

Sophocles, the very famous ancient Greek writer, wisely stated: “One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: That word is love.” Sarojini’s approach to life was built upon this very word ‘love’ as its foundation. She remained steadfastly true to her ethical moorings, never wavering in her commitment to assuage suffering and nurture genuine understanding. Her patients were not mere cases receiving clinical attention; they were embraced into a circle of care that extended beyond the confines of the clinic. Sarojini’s gentle disposition and empathetic spirit captivated all those who came seeking relief and comfort in her ministrations.

She extended not only medical expertise but also essential emotional ballast, serving as a critical beacon of optimism in times of the most profound darkness and utter despair. Her engagement was holistic; she saw the complete person, not just the disease. The philosopher Kahlil Gibran expressed a sentiment that describes the core values of her life: “You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.” Her affection emanated as a gentle, regenerative anodyne, calming the distressed spirits of those sighing in overwhelming heartache. Her bequest in this vital domain of medicine is not merely a record of treatments, but a register of hearts healed and spirits uplifted by unconditional acceptance and love.

Beyond her professional life, Sarojini was the gravitational centre of our existence; a loving spouse, an undaunted mother, and a precious confidante. The habitat and the canvas of love we built together were a haven of affection and composure, a place where joy thrived, and the air was often vibrant with shared merriment. She cultivated her family with boundless tenderness, sowing and nurturing the essential precepts of benevolence, rectitude, and resilience within us. In return, we never made her cry, but sometimes she cried for others, and some made her cry, too.

Her capacity for quiet strength was remarkable; she could maintain perfect equilibrium even when confronted with severe setbacks, always taking deliberate, measured steps to restore serenity and balance. Her affection is a vibrant force that persists in the deepest recesses of our hearts, a covenant that triumphantly surpasses the limitations of physical existence and the transience of life. The deep impact of her role as a matriarch cannot be overstated; she was the silent architect of our moral framework and emotional stability, and the queen of our hearts.

As we reflect on her exceptional life and the vast bounty of goodness she left behind, our determination is not to be subdued by the grief of her physical absence, but rather, to eulogise the radiant splendour of her time amongst us. It is a legacy beyond epithets and the true portrayal of the lilting music of remembrance. We feel the unremitting pain of missing her absolutely and profoundly. She may have transitioned from this worldly realm, but her vital essence remains inextricably bound to ours, steering us with her quiet wisdom and inspiring us with her incomparable dignity. Sarojini’s life stands as an eternal affidavit to the transformative power of enduring love, deep empathy, and sacrificial duty. It remains a boon that richly augments our present and illuminates our future. True beauty, as she demonstrated, is not simply what the eyes can witness, but, more crucially, what the soul can permanently safeguard. What we perceive visually is destined to fade, but the treasures we store within our hearts will remain eternally.

Many, including myself, our daughter Maneesha and our grandchildren, Joshua, Malaika and Jaydon, have endeavoured with every available adjective and hyperbolic utterance to paint a faithful portrait of the superlative person that was Sarojini. Yet, even if we were to compile tomes detailing her excellence, the effort would still fall short of creating a realistic depiction that truly captures her profile. It is simply impossible to confine a description of her magnificence to even a substantial plethora of words.

For my part, I had the wonderful pleasure of the company of that stunning lady for all those blessed years, from the dawn of our courtship in 1973 until her fateful day of final rest. Despite the finality of that separation, memories remain the ultimate constant. I will forever recall her life as an exquisite and enduring strand, a beautiful composition, that will never diminish and will reverberate throughout the balance of my time on this planet Earth.

Sarojini, your loved ones strive daily to revere your memory by actively embodying the virtues you demonstrated so effortlessly: boundless compassion, humane benevolence, unbridled affection, and an unwavering commitment to the welfare of others. This is a matter of seminal importance to us, as it is a pledge towards the continuity of the very matrix of your tapestry of life on Mother Earth.

Darling Sara, I will end with a couple of lines from the 1996 Quadruple Chart Topper “Because You Loved Me” by Celine Dion, which very concisely sums up what you were to me: –

“You’ve been my inspiration.

Through the lies, you were the truth.

My world is a better place because of you.”

Dr B. J. C. Perera ✍️