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Remembering our angel on her three-month death anniversary

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I am glad that I received the opportunity to write a few words about our late sister, Naomi Angela de Silva Wijeyeratne. Our late sister Naomi was born on January 4, 1964. Unlike the others in our family, her christening was getting delayed as our Mum was quick to realize that this little girl was different compared to the others. So both our Mum and Dad were very keen to find out what was wrong with this child, the 11th in our family. After many check-ups and consultations with doctors, they were made to understand that she was “differently-abled”.

I am certain that our Mum’s and Dad’s dreams for her future may have been shattered as they realized the implications of her condition. But they had the courage to come to terms with the effect that their limitations and special needs had on them and the rest of the family. So they developed appropriate attitudes and skills as her carers.

With all this happening at home, time had passed by without the knowledge of our parents. After a year or two, they realized that this little girl had not been christened yet. Our Dad was very famous for giving great names for his children and everyone was kept guessing as to what he will name this special child. We have heard many stories from his younger days when our Dad’s Love or his Sweetheart had always been our Mum, Zoe Linnette Naomi.

So he borrowed the name “Naomi” from his sweetheart to show that this child is sweet. One name had already been picked and he was sure that’s going to be her first name. From the day our parents got to know that this sweet little girl was a differently abled child, our Dad always said that she is the Angel of the family and is a blessing to the family to have her with us. I will be talking about the blessing later, but with this in his mind, he chose the name Angela and finally decided that her name would be “Naomi Angela” and for him, she was always his “Sweet Angel”.

 She was never given the opportunity that is the right of every human being, to lead a fulfilling and independent life. She always lived completely dependent on the mercy of those around her. A person devoid of ego, whose very existence begged the question not who am I and what can I do, but rather, what kind of people are you and what are you prepared to do for me.

 She badly felt the loss of our Dad when he passed away in 1987, her favourite during the early part of her life, but settled down quite well with Mum being by her side. But when our Mum passed away in 2019 she was incapable of coming to terms with it. She knew that her Depi Akka was behind her, supported by sister Vinodini, and the entire family will be backing her, but the loss of both parents was certainly unbearable for her. After Mum had passed away at a farewell to one of her teachers, the teacher had asked all the children to laugh but our Naoma girl was to herself. Then the teacher asked her why Naomi you also laugh but her reply was heart breaking. Let me put it with her own words, as she said “No, I have no Thaththa, I have no Amma and my sister is my Pana”. (Life)

Our Mum and Dad set an example for us and I can vouch for it by saying that our sister Depika took the lead and all my brothers and sisters followed what was taught to us by letting her know that “if you cannot talk. We will be your voice, if you cannot stand, we will support you. If you cannot walk, we will carry you. We are here for you and we will stay with you through it all.” This was just what each and every member of our family did for her and it was really a blessing for all of us to walk with her through her life and to make sure that she enjoyed and lived well right until the very end.

Wherever she went she was able to win the hearts of the people. She was full of humour and laughter. She loved going for parties beautifully dressed, and she was able to match her accessories to match the dress. When someone comments on her dress she was always on top of the world. She kept strong family bonds. She was innocent and the most lovable in the family. She gave us the gift of unconditional love. Unconditional love is loving even when it hurts, even when it’s not easy.

It’s loving because you simply can’t help but love. And the greatest triumph of any life. To love and to be loved. Our Sweet Angel taught us how to love without words, without limits, without reason. She taught us about kindness and patience, because it takes a lot of love, patience and dedication to care for her needs day after day. It is truly loving without condition, and it is perhaps the most beautiful and purest form of love that exists. She made that kind of love exist. She made it possible.

And finally, Naoma girl gave us the gift of beauty. Her life wasn’t easy or glamorous. There were many hard times, for her and for the whole family. But she taught us how to look past the difficulties and find beauty in life, for there is always beauty; she made our lives beautiful. We are glad that we had her in our family and how true our Dad was, when 59 years ago he said our Sweet Angel was truly a blessing for our family!

She enjoyed her life and she entertained us as much as we entertained her. She loved music and dancing and there was no Christmas without her taking to the dance floor. I would be proved wrong if I don’t say that all in the family including her nephews and nieces who have joined her on the dance floor. It was her love for carols that resulted in our Mum organizing carol sessions during the Christmas season, which continues to this day and even during the Covid period.

Our “Sweet Angel” received her call from Jesus on July 6, 2023. She lived a long and peaceful life of 59 years, six months and two days. She never caused harm to anyone, never committed any sin and she was completely righteous and a perfect Angel in our family.

“Now sleep my little Darling Angel, and rest your eyes”. Although we cry and stand grief-stricken, we promise not to forget the loving memories you gave – but we still miss you and we once again long to hear your caring words. We will make sure that you will be remembered in all our get-togethers in time to come. We are certain that the Pearly Gates would have been wide open to receive you and St. Peter would have specially invited Dad and Mum together with our sisters Anne and Ramani to be at the gates to welcome you with open arms. So enjoy their company once again until “we shall meet on that beautiful shore”.

Eternal rest grant unto her O’Lord and let perpetual light shine upon her. May she rest in peace, Amen.

VPdeSW



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Opinion

The Indian Ocean as a zone of peace

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Late Prime Minister Sirimavo Bandaranaike

Recently, we all held our breath when a conflict began to develop very close to Sri Lanka. The sinking of the Iranian frigate IRIS Dena in the Indian Ocean took place in international waters about 30 miles from Sri Lanka’s southern coast. As the whole world watched, the President and the Government of Sri Lanka were faced with a humanitarian crisis. A second Iranian ship was also in distress and needed assistance. Although Sri Lanka’s maritime history dates back to 5th

Century BCE, this type of geopolitical crisis has been very rare.

Sri Lanka considered it the moral responsibility of the country to help out those affected during this geopolitical crisis. It chose to activate its role as a custodian of the Indian Ocean. Perhaps, not many individuals are aware of Sri Lanka’s historical role in calling on the United Nations to declare the Indian Ocean a Zone of Peace. In 1971, under the leadership of the first woman prime minister of the world, Sirimavo Bandaranaike, Sri Lanka, together with Tanzania brought forth a resolution to the 26th Session of the General Assembly of the United Nations to declare the Indian Ocean a “Zone of Peace.” This was done to avoid it being used by superpower rivalries to gain military control of the region. Sri Lanka’s Ambassador Shirley Amarasinghe, the President of the 31st general Assembly of the UN was responsible for working on this resolution as with others dealing with the “Law of the Sea”.

Chandra Fernando, Educational Consultant, USA)

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Opinion

The shadow of a Truman moment in the Iran war

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Wars often produce moments when leaders feel compelled to seek a decisive stroke that will end the conflict once and for all. History shows that such moments can generate choices that would have seemed unthinkable only months earlier. When Harry S. Truman authorised the atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki in 1945, the decision emerged from precisely such wartime pressures. As the conflict involving the United States, Israel and Iran intensifies today, the world must ensure that a similar moment of desperate calculation does not arise again.

The lesson of that moment in history is not that such weapons can end wars, but that once the logic of escalation begins to dominate wartime decision-making, even the most unthinkable options can enter the realm of strategic calculation. The mere possibility that such debates could arise is reason enough for policymakers everywhere to approach the present conflict with extreme caution.

As the war drags on, both Donald Trump and Benjamin Netanyahu will face mounting pressure to produce decisive results. Wars rarely remain confined to their original scope once expectations of rapid victory begin to fade. Political leaders must demonstrate progress, military planners search for breakthroughs, and public narratives increasingly revolve around the need for a conclusive outcome. In this environment, media speculation about “exit strategies” or “off-ramps” for Washington can unintentionally increase pressure on decision-makers. Even well-intentioned commentary can shape the climate in which leaders make decisions, potentially nudging them toward harder, more dramatic actions.

Neither the United States nor Israel lacks the technological capability associated with advanced nuclear arsenals. The nuclear arsenals of advanced powers today are far more sophisticated than the devices used in 1945. While their existence is intended primarily as deterrence, prolonged wars have historically forced strategic communities to examine every available option. Even the discussion of such possibilities is deeply unsettling, yet ignoring the pressures that produce such debates can be dangerous.

For that reason, policymakers and societies on all sides must recognise the full range of choices that prolonged wars can place before leaders. For Iran’s leadership and its wider strategic community, absorbing this reality may be essential if catastrophic escalation is to be avoided. From Tehran’s perspective, the conflict may well be seen as existential. Yet history also shows that wars framed as existential struggles can generate the most dangerous strategic decisions.

The intellectual climate in Washington has also evolved. A number of influential voices in Washington now argue that the United States has become excessively risk-averse and that restoring global credibility requires a more assertive posture. Such arguments reflect a broader shift toward the language of renewed deterrence and strategic competition. Yet this very logic can make it politically harder for leaders to conclude conflicts without visible demonstrations of strength.

The outcome of this conflict will also be watched closely by other major powers. In 1945, the atomic decision was shaped not only by the desire to end a brutal war but also by the strategic message it sent to rival states observing the emergence of a new geopolitical era. Today, other significant powers will similarly draw lessons from how the United States manages both the conduct and the conclusion of this conflict.

This is why cool judgment is essential at this stage of the war. Whether the original decision to go to war was wise or ill-advised is now largely beside the point. Once a conflict has begun, the overriding priority must be to prevent escalation into something far more dangerous.

In such moments, the international system can benefit from the quiet diplomacy of actors that retain a degree of strategic autonomy. Among emerging nations, India stands out as a major emerging power in this regard. Despite its energy dependence on the Gulf and deep economic engagement with the United States, India has consistently demonstrated a capacity to maintain independent channels of communication across geopolitical divides.

This unique positioning may allow New Delhi to explore, discreetly and without public fanfare, avenues for de-escalation with Washington, Tel Aviv and Tehran alike. At moments of heightened tension in international politics, the world sometimes requires what might be called an “adult in the room”: a state capable of engaging all sides while remaining aligned exclusively with none.

If the present conflict continues to intensify, the value of such diplomacy may soon become evident. The most important lesson from 1945 is not only the destructive power of nuclear weapons but the pressures that can drive leaders toward choices that later generations struggle to comprehend. History shows that when wars reach their most desperate phases, restraint remains the only safeguard against catastrophe.

(Milinda Moragoda is a former Cabinet Minister and diplomat from Sri Lanka and founder of the Pathfinder Foundation, a strategic affairs think tank, can be contacted via email@milinda. This was published ndtv.com on 2026.03.1

by Milinda Moragoda

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Opinion

Practicality of a trilingual reality in Sri Lanka

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Dr. B.J.C. Perera (Dr. BJCP) in his article ‘Language: The symbolic expression of thought’ (The island 10.03.2026) delves deeper into an area that he has been exploring recently – childhood learning. In this article he writes of ‘a trilingual Sri Lanka’, reminding me of an incident I witnessed some years ago.

Two teenagers, in their mid to late teens, of Muslim ethnicity were admitted to the hospital late at night, following a road traffic accident. They had sustained multiple injuries, a few needing surgical intervention. One boy had sustained an injury (among others) that needed relatively urgent attention, but in itself was not too serious. The other had also sustained a few injuries among which one particular injury was serious and needed sorting out, but not urgently.

After the preliminary stabilisation of their injuries, I had a detailed discussion with them as to what needed to be done. Neither of them spoke Sinhala to any extent, but their English was excellent. They were attending a well-known international school in Colombo since early childhood and had no difficulty in understanding my explanation – in English. The boys were living in Colombo, while their father would travel regularly to the East (of Sri Lanka) on business. The following morning, I met the father to explain the prevailing situation; what needs to be done, urgency vs. importance, a timeline, prioritisation of treatment, possible costs, etc.

Doctor’s dilemma

The father did not speak any English and in conversation informed me that he had put both his boys into an International School (from kindergarten onwards) in order to give them an English education. The issue was that the father’s grasp of Sinhala was somewhat rudimentary and therefore I found that I could not explain the differences in seriousness vs, urgency and prioritisation issues adequately within the possible budget restrictions. This being the case and as the children understood exactly what was needed, I then asked the sons to ‘educate’ the father on the issues that were at hand. The boys spoke to their father and it was then that I realised that their grasp of Tamil was the same as their father’s grasp of Sinhala!

In the end I had to get down a translator, which in this case was a junior doctor who spoke Tamil fluently; explained to him what was needed a few times as he was not that fluent in English, certainly less than the boys, and then getting him to explain the situation to the father.

What was disturbing was having related this episode at the time to be informed that this was not in fact not an isolated occurrence. That there is a growing number of children that converse well in English, but are not so fluent in their mother tongue. Is English ‘the mother tongue’ of this ‘new generation’ of children? The sad truth is no and tragically this generation is getting deprived of ‘learning’ in its most fundamental form. For unfortunately, correct grammar and syntax accompanied with fluency do not equal to learning (through a language). It is the natural process of learning two/three languages (0 to 5 years) that Dr. BJCP refers to as being bilingual/trilingual and is the underlying concept, which is the title of Dr. BJCP’s article ‘Language: The symbolic expression of thought’.

“Introduction into society”

It is critical to understand at a very deep level the extent and process of what learning in a mother tongue entails. The mother’s voice is arguably the first voice that a newborn hears. Generally speaking, from that point onwards till the child is ‘introduced into society’ that is the voice he /she hears most. In our culture this is the Dhorata wedime mangalyaya. Till then the infant gets exposed to only the voices of the immediate /close family.

Once the infant gets exposed to ‘society’ he /she is metaphorically swimming in an ocean of language. Take for example a market. Vendors selling their wares, shouting, customers bargaining, selecting goods, asking about the quality, freshness, other families talking among themselves etc. The infant is literally learning/conceptualizing something new all the time. This learning process happens continuously starting from home, at friends/relatives’ houses, get-to-gathers, festivals, temples etc. This societal exposure plays a dominant role as the child/infant gets older. Their language skills and vocabulary increase in leaps and bounds and by around three years of age they have reached the so-called ‘language explosion’ stage. This entire process of learning that the child undergoes, happens ‘naturally and effortlessly’. This degree of exposure/ learning can only happen in Sinhala or Tamil in this country.

Second language in chilhood

Learning a second language in childhood as pointed out by Dr BJCP is a cognitive gift. In fact, what it actually does is, deepens the understanding of the first language. So, this-learning of a second language- is in no way to be discouraged. However, it is critical to be cognisant of the fact that this learning of the second language also takes place within a natural environment. In other words, the child is picking up the language on his own. As readily illustrated in Dr. BJCP’s article, the home environment where the parents and grandparents speak different languages. He or she is not being ‘forcefully taught’ a language that has no relevance outside the ‘environment in which the second language is taught’. The time period we (myself and Dr. BJCP) are discussing is the 0 to 5-year-old.

It does not matter whether it is two or three languages during this period; provided that it happens naturally. For as Dr. BJCP states in his article ‘By age five, they typically catch up in all languages…’ To express this in a different way, if the child is naturally exposed to a second /third language during this 0 to 5-year-old period, he /she will naturally pick it up. It is unavoidable. He /she will not need any help in order for this to happen. Once the child starts attending school at the age of 5 or later, then being taught a second language formally is a very different concept to what happens before the age of 5.

The tragedy is parents, not understanding this undisputed significance of ‘learning in/a mother tongue’, during the critical years of childhood-0 to 5; with all good and noble intentions forcefully introduce their child to a foreign tongue (English) that is not spoken universally (around them) i. e., It is only spoken in the kindergarten; not at home and certainly nowhere, where the parents take their children.

Attending school

Once the child starts attending school in the English medium, there is no further (or minimal) exposure to his /her mother tongue -be it Sinhala or Tamil. This results in the child losing the ability to converse in his/her original mother tongue, as was seen earlier on. In the above incident that I described at the start of this article, when I finally asked the father did he comprehend what was happening; his eyes filled with tears and I did wonder was this because of his sons’ injuries or was it because his decisions had culminated in a father and a son/s who could no longer communicate with each other in a meaningful way.

Dr BJCP goes on to state that in his opinion ‘a trilingual Sri Lanka will go a long way towards the goals and display of racial harmony, respect for different ethnic groups…’ and ‘Then it would become a utopian heaven, where all people, as just Sri Lankans can live in admirable concordant synchrony, rather than as a splintered clusters divided by ethnicity, language and culture’. Firstly, it must be admitted from the aspect of the child’s learning perspective (0 to 5 years); an environment where all three languages are spoken freely and the child will naturally pick up all three languages (a trilingual reality) does not actually exist in Sri Lanka.

However, the pleasant practical reality is that, there is absolutely no need for a trilingual Sri Lanka for this utopian heaven to be achieved. What is needed is in fact not even a bilingual Sri Lanka, but a Sri Lanka, where all the Sinhalese are taught Tamil and vice versa. Simply stated it is complete lunacy– that two ethnic communities that speak their own language, need to learn another language that is not the mother tongue of either community in order to understand one another! It is the fact that having been ruled by the British for over a hundred years, English has been so close to us, that we are unable to see this for what it is. Imagine a country like Canada that has areas where French is spoken; what happens in order to foster better harmony between the English and French speaking communities? The ‘English’, learn to speak French and the ‘French’ learn to speak English. According to the ‘bridging language theory of Sri Lanka’, this will not work and what needs to happen is both communities need to learn a third language, for example German, in order to communicate with one another!

Learning best done in mother tongue

eiterating what I said in my previous article – ‘Educational reforms: A Perspective (The Island 27.02.2026) Learning is best done in one’s mother tongue. This is a fact, not an opinion. The critical thing parents should understand and appreciate is that the best thing they can do for their child is to allow/encourage learning in his/her mother tongue.

This period from 0 to 5 years is critically important. If your child is exposed naturally to another language during this period, he /she will automatically pick it up. There is no need to ‘forcefully teach’ him /her. Orchestrating your child to learn another language, -English in this instance- between the ages of 0 to 5 at the expense of learning in his /her mother tongue is a disservice to that child.

by Dr. Sumedha S. Amarasekara

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