A tribute to a man like no other

… Lal’s main satisfaction came from volunteering to treat the armed forces casualties in the Northern theatre of war. He made several such tours of duty.

By Dr Sarath Gamini De Silva
Consultant Physician

It was with much sadness that we paid our last respects to Dr. Shanthilal (Lal) de Silva on the 25th of March 2024. Lal, as he was affectionately called, was born on the 07th of July 1947, and had his entire education at Ananda College, Colombo, where his mother, Mrs Sumana de Silva had been a respected long serving teacher. His father was Mr Donald de Silva, an executive in the Department of Fisheries. Lal was the eldest in a family of three brothers and a sister.

Lal’s wife Shanthamali, Lal and myself were among the 150 students that entered the Colombo Medical School in 1967. Throughout the next five years we were together doing our clinical work and visiting various institutions for studying different aspects of medicine. We have remained in close contact, like a family helping each other, throughout the past 57 years.

After qualifying in 1972 we worked together in Kegalle, Matara and Colombo General Hospitals. Lal and Shanthi, a Paediatrician, served as consultants in Kurunegala, Negombo and Panadura hospitals as well. Numerous friends they made in those areas decades ago are still in close contact with Lal and Shanthi.

However, Lal’s main satisfaction came from volunteering to treat the armed forces casualties in the Northern theatre of war during terrorist activities. He made several such tours of duty. I still remember how he gave the details of the work he did in the North with much enthusiasm and hope. After retiring from the National Hospital in Colombo he served the Military Hospital as its regular surgeon for several more years.

Lal was a dedicated surgeon whose main purpose in life was to serve the people with no consideration for monetary gain. For this purpose, he played a pioneering role in getting an Intensive Care Unit established at the Matara Hospital.

By his creative methods of clinical teaching, coloured with much humour, he has trained a large group of surgeons for the nation. He would continue teaching in the hospital ward or working in the Operating Theatre even well after 4 O’clock in the evening without rushing out to engage in private practice. He was very popular among trainees who I understand were trying their best to get a training slot under Lal. He coaxed them to do the best and aim at reaching the top of the pass list at postgraduate exams. Quite a few have achieved as intended by Lal. I have no doubt that they will emulate the exceptional qualities of Lal, providing humane care to their patients. Thus, though Lal is no more, his legacy will live on, serving the people through his disciples in surgery.

I was the Bestman at their wedding in 1974, just two weeks before Nelun and I got married. When I had my own cardiac bypass surgery, Shanthi and Lal were comforting Nelun and our children outside the cardiac operating theatre throughout the procedure. When Nelun’s mother was dying while we were abroad, Shanthi and Lal kept vigil with my children doing everything that was needed in our absence.

Lal and Shanthamali were perhaps the most popular couple in our batch. Their very friendly demeanour and their willingness to step in to help anyone in need forgetting their own affairs made them the most looked-up-to couple in our midst. Just a few years ago, the extent to which they went to save the life of a batchmate, misdiagnosed as a cancer at first, but which eventually turned out to be a curable infection, was exemplary. That lady attended his funeral, hale and hearty.

Batchmates living abroad used to visit them even during a short holiday here. When we had reunions of batchmates, Lal was very keen to participate, even later in life when he had difficulty in getting about. Just four months ago when he could hardly walk unsupported, he insisted on attending the funeral of a batch mate in Kandy. We had to virtually carry him there.

In fact, the batchmates in UK spent a lot of resources in the past week doing various meritorious activities conveying blessings on Lal for a speedy recovery. But that was not to be. I know Shanthi is at present receiving messages of condolences from batch mates all over the world. For technical reasons the family could not fulfil the desire of many of them to watch the proceedings of the funeral on zoom.

Twenty-eight of our original batch of 150 have passed away already. But the loss today of Lal affects Nelun and myself most, as he was like a brother, very close to us, and an uncle for my children, living just one kilometre away for the past 30 years. Lal had a list of birthdays and called them with birthday wishes without fail. Hundreds of relations, friends, schoolmates and batchmates who paid their last respects at his funeral is ample testimony to the high esteem with which Lal was held during life.

Lal had a special love for children. He had a nickname for most of the children of his friends. My two little daughters stayed with them for a few months in Matara after I came on transfer to Karapitiya. He even organised birthday parties for them during that time.

He gave financial assistance freely for the education of children of the disadvantaged.

In the past few years Lal’s health was gradually deteriorating with kidney disease. Shanthi looked after him with utmost devotion and care. She stayed with him through about 120 sessions of haemodialysis weekly each lasting about 5 hrs. This was while looking after her own elderly mother at home.

Dear Shanthi, console yourself. You have done your noble duty as the wife to look after Lal throughout his prolonged illness. I am confident you have the strength of character and fortitude to overcome this bereavement and continue with your life doing as much charitable work as before, looking after your ageing mother as well. Have no fear. We will be at your side if the need arises.

I offer my sincere condolences to members of both families and the large circle of friends and relations who have lost a man of exceptional quality.

So, all good souls should come to rest. All our batch mates and acquaintances throughout the world join me in making this wish. Lal, may your journey in sansara be short! With all the merit acquired during this life, may you eventually attain the supreme bliss of nibbana.

Good bye my dear friend!