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Aging has its minuses but pluses can be extracted

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Aging is not ‘lost youth’ but a new stage of opportunity and strength – Betty Frieden

This period in one’s life of ageing which the Japanese have pushed to beyond 90 years recently, but usually considered as past the Biblical age of three score and ten, can truly be a time of opportunity and being stronger psychologically and emotionally, particularly for women. As a Buddhist I say that ageing like death are inevitable and thus fighting against either or refusing to accept them as realities is foolish and detrimental. What needs to be done is accept change as a sure thing in life and listening to the wisdom of the Buddha, cultivate and improve upekka or equanimity. (Not at all easy to do, but effort must be persistent)

Reading the final chapter in Nerve by Martha Piper and Indira Samarasekera, I find my ideas are much in agreement in what they write in Chapter 16 – Super-aging: the joys of old age.

They begin their chapter thus: “Current research suggest that women may anticipate several decades of a vibrant physical and intellectual life after retiring.” They reiterate that much research is on living longer but they “believe the goal should be how to live better regardless of the length of time you have.” (I commented on the book and wrote about Indira in a previous article).

Yes, of course it is quality of life that has to be targeted and not years of survival. And I need no backing of medical or geriatric experts and researchers when saying this depends on each person.

Women have so many advantages over men; the first in the ageing process being that retirement from a career is just one of those things, usually. Even a career woman takes the fact that her working life is over with not much heartburn and seldom mental distress. Men often go to pieces. Most of them feel lost without their 9.00 to 5.00 jobs.

On the other hand women have so many avenues to walk down although growing greyer; having much more time on their hands and far less family responsibilities and none career-wise. They will lose the eager bounce in body and legs, but with mind alert and determination to make the most of the rest of their lives, they can go on happily. Of course this positivity needs mighty effort and determination.

Those who did no career jobs but were housewives, accept easily old age and are supported morally and materially by grown up children. Their emotional sustenance is through seeing their grandchildren develop.

As anyone ages, family ties and friendships take on more significance and the more time one spends with people one favours, the better for the psyche and even physical well being. A strong bit of advice is to broaden interests and start a new hobby or pastime. Religion plays a very significant role here.

Personal tidbits

Speaking for myself, giving up jobs came gradually. When I was made to retire from my regular job due to age, I was invited to do a part time job and that eased the goodbye to professional work. I also continued teaching would-be librarians. But the greatest fillip I had was helping a friend who was teaching English to foreign Buddhist monks. They were from Bangladesh, Cambodia, and Thailand. I had told her that when I retired I would join her. Classes were on two weekdays and I loved it. I benefited much more than the monks or my friend in having a willing assistant. A Burmese meheni joined my class which was not a beginners’ class. My friend taught the basics of English while I mixed English literature with comprehension and speech. I particularly remember three pupils: the ten preceptor nun – Ven Annyasi – and two monks from Cambodia and Bangladesh. We helped the latter two with renewal of their annual visas; the Myanmar nun was affluent.

This ten preceptor was in Sri Lanka to read for her Masters in Buddhist studies. Even after we discontinued the teaching in a temple close at hand, she continued coming to me and I assisted her in her research and thesis writing. I was the greater benefitter as I learnt much more of Buddhist philosophy and it was delightful associating with this lovely, lively person. She once in a while brought Chinese food to share with me and the Bangladeshi monk to whom she was an older sister cum mentor. The Cambodian monk returned to his village once he got his BA and helped his mother. He gave up robes as home responsibilities increased.

The Bangladeshi Bhikkhu – Ven Shanta, 18 years then, wished to sit the OL English literature paper. I tutored him through the syllabuses of language and literature and he obtained a credit pass. So, inevitably, he and I decided he attempt the AL English paper. It was delightful leading him through Shakespeare’s Othello and sonnets; Jane Austen and other texts and poems. No problem discussing sexual love and all that. He was able to get to underlying themes and meanings and a favourite expression of his which I hear in my head even now was ‘Mindset of the author/poet’. He is researching for his PhD in Buddhism in Hongkong and sends me essays to go through. He even applied for a scholarship to Harvard Divinity School. He did not succeed last year but that will not stop him.

I have written personally since I want to share the good fortune that came to me. If we oldies can avoid mental problems, we are well on the way to enjoying senior citizenship. However, it needs must be mentioned that hazards are more present to the older. Accidents are always a danger, like taking a toss. One could be ever so careful but one can miss a step or tumble over a stone on the road. Infinite care is necessary; good luck or karma too, I believe.

Thus while ageing can be very undemanding emotionally, physically much care has to be taken.

Best news for oldies

I quote from an article in the New England Journal of Medicine. “The director of the George Washington University College of Medicine argues that the brain of an elderly person is much more plastic than is commonly believed. At this age, the interaction of the right and left hemispheres of the brain becomes harmonious, which expands our creative possibilities. That is why among people over 60 you can find many personalities who have just started their creative activities.” The brain slows down, but as is said, it gains flexibility. That is why with age, in most cases, the right decision can be made and a person is less exposed to negative emotions. It has been found that the peak of human intellectual activity occurs at about 70 years of age. Imagine that! The brain works at full strength then.

“Over time, the amount of myelin in the brain increases, a substance that facilitates the rapid passage of signals between neurons. Due to this, intellectual abilities are increased by 300% compared to the average. Also interesting is the fact that after 60 years, a person can use two hemispheres at the same time. This allows you to solve much more complex problems.

Professor Oury Monchi from the University of Montreal believes that the brain of an elderly person chooses the least energy-intensive path, cutting unnecessary and leaving only the right options for solving the problem. A study was conducted in which different age groups took part. Young people were confused a lot when passing the tests, while those over 60 made the right decisions.”

The article listed features of the brain of an elderly person, of which the more easily understood I pass on.

The neurons of the brain do not die off, connection between them simply disappears if a person does not engage in mental work.

Absentmindedness and forgetfulness appear due to an overabundance of information. Thus there is no need to focus on trifles.

The conclusion is that if a person leads a healthy life style, moves, has physical activity and encourages full mental activity, intellectual abilities do not decrease with age, but only grow, reaching a peak by age 80-90 years.

Isn’t that most encouraging to us older folk?


A study in the US found that:

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The most productive age is from 60-70 years

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The second most productive human stage is from 70-80 years

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The third most productive stage is from 50-60

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The average age of the Nobel Prize laureates is 62

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The average age of presidents of 100 largest companies in the world is 63

Hence we of the older generation should be comforted by all this and determine to lead fulfilling, quality lives.

 



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Religious extremism set to gain from rising Israel-Iran hostilities

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The costs of extremism; the Twin Tower blasts of 9/11.

Many of the international pronouncements on the current dangerously escalating Israel-Iran hostilities could be seen as lacking in adequate balance and comprehensiveness. The majority of these reactions could be said to be failing in addressing the aspects of the conflict that matter most.

For example, there is the recent UN General Assembly resolution on the crisis which calls for an ‘immediate, unconditional and lasting ceasefire in the Gaza’ and which goes on to urge ‘Member States to take necessary steps to ensure Israel complies with its international legal obligations.’ An immediate and durable ceasefire is indeed the number one requirement in the Middle East today but could it be ‘unconditional’? Could it ignore the principal requirement of Israel’s security? These posers need to be addressed as well.

Besides, it is not only Israel that should be compelled to meet its ‘international legal obligations.’ All the states and actors that feature in the conflict need to be alerted to their ‘international legal obligations’. While it goes without saying that Israel must meet its international legal obligations fully, the same goes for Iran and all other Middle Eastern countries that enjoy UN membership and who are currently at odds with Israel. For instance, Israel is a UN member state that enjoys equal sovereignty with other states within the UN fold. No such state could seek to ‘bomb Israel out of existence’ for example.

As a significant ‘aside’ it needs to be mentioned that we in Sri Lanka should consider it appropriate to speak the truth in these matters rather than dabble in what is ‘politically correct’. It has been seen as ‘politically correct’ for Sri Lankan governments in particular to take up the cause of only the Palestinians over the decades without considering the legitimate needs of the Israelis. However, a lasting solution to the Middle East imbroglio is impossible to arrive at without taking into account the legitimate requirements of both sides to the conflict.

The G7, meanwhile, is right in stating that ‘Israel has a right to defend itself’, besides ‘reiterating our support for the security of Israel’ but it urges only ‘a de-escalation’ of hostilities and does not call for a ceasefire, which is of prime importance.

It is only an enduring ceasefire that could lay the basis for a cessation of hostilities which could in turn pave the way for the provision of UN humanitarian assistance to the people of the Gaza uninterruptedly for the foreseeable future. There is no getting away from the need for a durable downing of arms which could engender the environment required for negotiations between the warring parties.

Meanwhile, some 22 Muslim majority countries have ‘warned that continued escalation threatens to ignite a broader regional conflict that could destabilize the Middle East’ and called ‘for a return to negotiations as the only solution regarding Iran’s nuclear program.’ This statement addresses some important issues in the crisis but one hopes that the pronouncement went on to call for negotiations that would take up the root causes for the conflict as well and pointed to ways that could address them. For instance, there is no getting away from the ‘Two State Solution’ that envisages peaceful coexistence between the principal warring parties.

The ‘Two State Solution’ has been discredited by sections of the world community but it outlines the most sensible solution to the conflict. As matters stand, the current escalating hostilities, if left unchecked, could not only lead to a wider regional war of attrition but bring about the annihilation of entire populations. There is no alternative to comprehensive negotiations that take on the issues head on.

Besides, all who matter in the current discourse on the crisis need to alert themselves to the dangers of appealing to the religious identities of communities and social groups. When such appeals are made religious passions are stirred, which in turn activate extremist religious outfits that operate outside the bounds of the law and prove difficult to rein-in. This was essentially how ‘9/11’ came about. Accordingly, speaking with a sense of responsibility proves crucial.

In fact, it could be argued that a continuation of the present hostilities would only benefit the above outfits with a destructive mindset. Therefore, comprehensive and constructive negotiations are of the first importance.

The above conditions should ideally be observed by both parties to the conflict. Israel, no less than the Islamic and Arab world, needs to adhere to them. Israeli Prime Minister Netanyahu has no choice but to say ‘No’ to extremists within his cabinet and to ‘show them the door’, inasmuch as hot-headed extremists in the Islamic and Arab world need to be opposed and alienated by the relevant governments.

Meanwhile, the US is on a duplicitous course in the Middle East. Whereas it has no choice but to rein-in Israel and convince it of the need to negotiate an end to the conflict, it is choosing to turn a blind eye to Israel’s military excesses and other irregularities that are blighting the Gazans and the ordinary people of Iran. It ought to be plain to the Trump administration that it is promoting a barbaric war of attrition by continuing to provide Israel with the most lethal weaponry. Currently, it is anybody’s guess as to what the US policy on the Middle East is.

The Islamic and Arab world, on the other hand, should come to understand the imperatives for a defusing of tensions in the region. Decades of conflict and war ought to have made it clear that the suffering of the populations concerned would not draw to a close minus a negotiated peace that ensures the wellbeing of all sections concerned.

As pointed out, the security of Israel needs to be guaranteed by those quarters opposing it. This will require the adoption of a conciliatory attitude towards Israel by state and non-state actors who have thus far been hostile towards it. There needs to be a steady build-up of goodwill on both sides of the divide. If this is fully realized by the Arab world a negotiated solution will be a realistic proposition in the Middle East.

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She deserves the crown

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We had no luck coming our way at the Miss World 2025 contest – not even our immediate neighbour, India – but I’m glad that Miss Thailand was crowned Miss World 2025 as Thailand happens to be my second home … been to Amazing Thailand many times, courtesy of the Tourism Authority of Thailand.

In fact, even before the Miss World 2025 grand finale, which was held at the beautiful venue of the HITEX Exhibition Centre, in Hyderabad, Telangana, India, my colleagues at office all predicted that Miss Thailand, Opal Suchata Chuangsri, would emerge as the winner.

Yes, indeed, Miss Thailand not only won the hearts of millions but also became the first ever Thai to claim this much sought-after title.

Prior to winning the title of Miss World 2025, Opal Suchata was Thailand’s representative at Miss Universe 2024 and took home the third runner-up title.

Her Miss Universe crown, unfortunately, was subsequently forfeited, due to a contract breach, but she did not let that demotivate her, though, and went on to compete and win the title of Miss World Thailand 2025.

Coming from a family that was in the hospitality industry, her upbringing, in this kind of environment, made her aware of her culture and helped her with her communication skills at a very young age. They say she is very fluent in Thai, English, and Chinese.

Obviously, her achievements at the Miss World 2025 contest is going to bring the 22-year-old beauty immense happiness but I couldn’t believe that this lovely girl, at 16, had surgery to remove a benign breast lump, and that made her launch the ‘Opal For Her’ campaign to promote breast health awareness and early detection of breast cancer, which also became the topic of her ‘Beauty with Purpose’ at the Miss World 2025 contest.

Opal Suchata intends to leverage her Miss World title to advocate for other women’s health issues, as well, and sponsor a number of charitable causes, specifically in women’s health.

Her victory, she says, is not just a personal achievement but a reflection of the dreams and aspirations of young girls around the world who want to be seen, heard, and create change.

What’s more, with interests in psychology and anthropology, Opal Suchata aspires to become an ambassador for Thailand, aiming to represent her country on international platforms and contribute to peace-building efforts.

She believes that regardless of age or title, everyone has a role to play in inspiring others and making a positive impact.

And, what’s more, beyond pageantry, Opal Suchata is an animal lover, caring for 16 cats and five dogs, making her a certified “fur mom.”

She also possesses a special musical ability—she can play the ukulele backwards.

Opal Suchata is already a star with many expressing admiration for her grace, leadership, and passion for making a difference in the world.

And there is also a possibility of this head-turner, from Thailand, entering the Bollywood film industry, after completing her reign as Miss World, as she has also expressed interest in this field.

She says she would love the opportunity and praised the Indian film indstry.

She akso shared her positive experience during her visit to India and her appreciation for the Telangana government.

Congratulations Opal Suchata Chuangsri from Amazing Thailand. You certainly deserve the title Miss World 2025.

What is important is that the Miss World event is among the four globally recognised beauty pageants … yes, the four major international beauty pageants for woment. The other three are Miss Universe, Miss Earth and Miss International.

Unfortunately, in our scene, you get beauty pageants popping up like mushrooms and, I would say, most of them are a waste of money and time for the participants.

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Wonders of Coconut Oil…

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This week I thought of working on some beauty tips, using coconut oil, which is freely available, and quite affordable, as well.

Let’s start with Coconut Oil as a Moisturiser…

First, make sure your skin is clean and dry before applying the coconut oil. This will allow the oil to penetrate the skin more effectively.

Next, take a small amount of coconut oil and warm it up in your hands by rubbing them together. This will help to melt the oil and make it easier to apply.

Gently massage the oil onto your face and body, focusing on dry areas or areas that need extra hydration.

Allow the oil to absorb into your skin for a few minutes before getting dressed.

Start with a small amount and add more if needed.

* Acne and Blemishes:

Apply a small amount to the affected area and gently massage it in. Leave it on overnight and rinse off in the morning. Remember to patch test before applying it to your entire face to ensure you don’t have any adverse reactions.

* Skin Irritations:

If you’re dealing with skin irritations, coconut oil may be just what you need to find relief. Coconut oil has natural anti-inflammatory properties that can help soothe and calm irritated skin.

Simply apply a thin layer of coconut oil to the affected area and gently massage it in. You can repeat this process as needed throughout the day to keep your skin calm and comfortable.

* Makeup Remover:

To use coconut oil as a makeup remover, simply apply a small amount onto a cotton pad or your fingertips and gently massage it onto your face, in circular motions. The oil will break down the makeup, including waterproof mascara and long-wearing foundation, making it easy to wipe away.

Not only does coconut oil remove makeup, but it also nourishes and hydrates the skin, leaving it feeling soft and smooth. Plus, its antibacterial properties can help prevent breakouts and soothe any existing skin irritations, so give coconut oil a try and experience its natural makeup removing abilities, and also say goodbye to acne and blemishes!

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